The mask has fallen
by fictionlove101
Summary: JJ thought she'd left her old life behind. What happens when it comes back to hurt her again and her biggest secrets are told. WARNING contains mentions of abuse, attempted rape and violence. Crossover with Higher Ground
1. Chapter 1

**A/N HELLO! OK so this was previously added as a crossover between Criminal Minds and Higher Ground but I didn't feel there were enough people reading it so (as a suggestion from a brilliant review I got. Thankyou **crazyobsession101**) I am putting it back up with a different name and just in the Criminal Minds section. For those of you who haven't heard of Higher Ground its a TV show from about 10 years ago and AJ Cook was one of the main characters. It explains more in the Story in chapters to come.**

**There are some really good Criminal Minds/Higher Ground crossovers on here but most of the aren't finished ( that's ok I can understand when you loose interest in something) so I thought I would write one that WILL get finished, it might take a few weeks but I will get there before the year is out. This is a light chapter but they will get darker. **

**AJ x**

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><p>It was a normal paper work day at the FBI and in the BAU sat on desks and chairs were David Rossi, Derek Morgan, Spencer Reid, Jennifer "JJ" Jareau, Penelope Garcia and Emily Prentiss. They were laughing and joking about the night they had out together a few weeks previous, but what they didn't know was one of the team's world was about to be ripped apart.<p>

"That girl was hanging on your ear Morgan" Emily laughed.

"You can't give us that sweet and innocent act, you loved it and I bet you anything, you took her home. Am I right?" JJ added her bit in.

Morgan stared at the women trying to look hurt and shocked.

"The fact that you would even think I was like that Jayje really hurts." Morgan put his hand on his heart.

"Well sweet cheeks the fact you still had lipstick on your neck the next morning suggests you did in fact not go home alone." Garcia added from Emily's desk chair.

They kept chatting away for another few minutes until they were joined by their boss Aaron Hotchner.

"Have you lot finished your reports yet?" He asked knowing full well that it was too early in the day for anyone but the genius Spencer Reid to be finished.

"I have!" Reid said from his chair raising a hand and receiving daggers from Morgan and a whispered 'suck up' from Emily.

"And the rest of you?"

They looked sheepishly at each other, Morgan was about to defend them by saying they were just taking a break but was stopped by the sound of a grown coming from Rossi.

"What's up Rossi?" Morgan asked looking confused at the older man.

"Strauss heading our way, 12 O'clock with two of her minions following."

They all turned to see Strauss making a b-line for the team.

"Morgan what did you do?" Reid whispered only loud enough for the team to hear.

"What why m…" He was stopped when Strauss approached.

"Ma'am. Is there something we can do for you?" Hotch asked in a tone he only used when talking to the woman he really didn't like.

"Yes Agent Hotchner you can." The way she spoke seemed different to the way she normally was and the hole team even Garcia knew there was something wrong "This is U.S. Marshal Jenkins" She pointed to the younger of the two men. He looked about 40 with salt and pepper hair "and also U.S. Marshal Willis." She then pointed to the older man. He was about 55 and had white hair.

What the team didn't realize was when Strauss and the other men walked in all the color drained from JJ's face and there was a look of fear in her eyes.

'Oh God, it's him. I remember him, he was so nice to us, but why is he here. What is he doing here? He could screw everything up... C'mon JJ pull your self together. There just here on a case and he has been doing this job long enough to know when to keep his mouth closed. I hope.'

"We would like to speak with Agent Jareau." When Strauss finished she locked eyes with JJ to let her know that she had no choice in the matter.

"Yes ma'am, you can use my office." Hotch pointed to the open door behind him as he looked at JJ's pale complexion.

"Thankyou." Strauss signaled to JJ to walk and she did. They walked up the few steps followed my both U.S. Marshals. All four people walked into the office and closed the door behind them, but they didn't think to close the blinds too, giving the rest of the team a perfect view of what was happening in the room.

"Ok." Garcia piped up with a lot of worry in her voice "Why do those scary looking Marshals want to talk to our buttercup?"

"I haven't a clue baby girl but did you see the fear in JJ's eyes when Strauss introduced them."

"She was a white as a sheet." Emily added.

The team watched through the window as the four people talked then Willis seemed to hand JJ something along with a folder. JJ was frozen on the spot for a minute then broke down and crumbled to the floor.

"What the hell!" Before the team could say anything to each other they were all heading for the office door.

Morgan banged on it. Less than a second later the door opened a crack and Strauss looked out at the worried faces.

"This is a private conversation Agent Morgan!" Strauss spat.

"Ma'am what's going on?" Hotch asked maneuvering himself in front of Morgan so he could get a peek through the door at JJ who was sobbing on her knees being gently rocked by Marshal Willis.

"We will be out in a minute!" before either Morgan or Hotch could stop her she slammed the door in her face. They moved to the window but Strauss appeared and closed the blinds.

"DAMIT! What the hell in going on in there?" Morgan growled.

5 minutes later the door to the office opened and the three older agents walked out. Strauss shook both Marshals hands and they walked out the BAU.

"Ma'am?" Hotch took a step closer and could see where a single tear had wiped away a small trail of makeup "What's going on?"

"You are all being given a few weeks off. Do with as you wish but I suggest that you all help Agent Jareau with what needs to be done."

Strauss turned to leave.

"Ma'am with all due respect, that doesn't answer Agent Hotchner's question." Emily took a step next to Hotch.

Strauss sighed; all she wanted to do was go to her office.

"It's not my place to say. When Agent Jareau is ready she will tell you her self but another suggestion." She looked into each and everyone's eyes "Don't push her. She is going to need you all to be strong."

Everyone looked on as the older woman walked out of the BAU towards her office. The team looked at each other for a second shocked then they all headed to Hotch's office. Hotch swung open his door.

"JJ what's going…." He was stopped mid sentence as he was pushed back and JJ came sprinting out of the room with her hand over her mouth.

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><p><strong>AN ****Please leave reviews and let me know what you think. i really do hope that i get more intrest in it now.**

**AJ x**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N The first 3 chapters are going up really quick **

**AJ x**

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><p>Strauss closed the door when both the United States Marshals had walked in.<p>

"Agent Jareau, please take a seat." Strauss signalled to the couch in Hotch's office.

"I'm fine standing Thankyou ma'am." JJ said looking at the old white haired man in front of her.

"Fine then." Strauss almost snapped but kept her voice level as she knew that what JJ was about to be told would open many closed wounds "Agent Jareau, Do you remember Marshal Willis?"

"Yes ma'am. How are you sir?" JJ would have reached out to shake his hand but her hands were shaking so much she thought better of it.

"I'm Ok Thankyou Jennifer. Although I cant say time has been as kind to me as it has to you." Willis said with a smile. JJ forced a chuckle.

The room stayed silent for a minute and JJ looked at the older people in the room. Strauss had her cold hard look like always, but if you looked in her eyes hard enough you could see the worry. Marshal Willis looked pale and like he hadn't slept the night before and then last Marshal Jenkins didn't seem to be showing any emption at all.

"Ma'am I don't need to be rude but what's going on?" JJ asked finally having enough of the fear inside her and the silent's of the room.

Strauss opened her mouth to say something but closed it again so Marshal Willis decided he was going to tell the woman the news.

"Jennifer I had a call from a friend of mind the other day." He took a deep breath knowing he was about to break her heart. He had watched her go through hell and back, she didn't need this. Not now she seemed to be doing so well. He took the file Jenkins was holding and pulled something out of his pocket.

"Jess was found dead a few nights ago." He handed her the file and placed the other object in her hand as well "I'm so sorry Jen."

At his words JJ felt her heart drop to the floor and tears fill her eyes. She didn't want to believe them, she couldn't. She did what she did for Jess; she did it to keep her safe.

""No! You're wrong. It's not Jess. She safe, she's with the others. You're wrong." JJ shook her head.

"Jennifer look in your hand." He pointed to the object but JJ shook her head refusing to look and believe "Look Jen" JJ opened her hand slowly "That's Jess's locket. You remember? That's the one you gave her."

JJ looked and sure enough there it was. The silver locked she had given Jess just days before she had left the safest place she had ever been.

"How?" JJ whispered as realization set in.

"We believe she was murdered by a client." Marshal Jenkins piped up from his spot on the other side of the room earning himself glares from both Willis and Strauss.

"Oh god. She's dead." JJ collapsed onto the floor in a heap and sobbed into her hands. Seconds after she hit the floor she was scooped up by a pair of hands and was held tight.

"She's dead and its all my fault. I shouldn't have gone. I should have done something to protect her." JJ kept sobbing into her hands.

"It's not your fault Jenny you thought she was safe." Willis whispered to her as he hugged her.

The room was filled with loud knocking but neither Willis or JJ moved from the floor. In the back of JJ's mind she could hear the mumbling of people talking but just ignored it. For the first time in years all the old feelings were coming back. The feeling of betrayal, hurt and pain. She had spent so long pushing those feelings away into a box in the back of her mind and building up a wall to keep the person she used to be away, JJ refused to let that wall break. The lost girl she grew up to be could not take her life.

The office door slammed closed and Strauss bent down to JJ and Willis on the floor.

"Agent Jareau." JJ took a deep breath untangled herself form the mans arms, wiped away her tears and tried her best to pull her self together till she was alone "You need to tell the team." Strauss said in a soft voice.

"No I can't tell them" JJ looked at Strauss in shock "They'll hate me."

"I'm sure that's not true." Strauss said.

"Yes it is, you don't know half the things I did to get by and there is no need to tell them because that person doesn't exist. I am Jennifer Jareau and I work for the FBI. I refuse to be that person again."

Marshal Jenkins's phone rang in his pocket. He answered it and started to talk in whispers.

"Jennifer, you need to tell them." Strauss now used her stern voice but the look in her eyes still said the she was deeply worried about the woman in front of her "You cant do this on you own. Everything is going to come back to the surface now." JJ looked at her with stubborn eyes "I hate to say this and if you ever tell anyone I have I will deny it, but your team is a family you are all extremely close they know something is going on and we both know that some of them are not going to let it slide"

"Im sorry to interrupt Sir, Ma'am" Marshal Jenkins snapped his phone closed "But we need to leave."

"Ok" Willis put his arm round JJ's waist and helped her over to the sofa "I have to go now Jen, but if you need to just call ok?" JJ nodded as tears started to well in her eyes again "I would like to come to the funeral if that's ok?"

"Yeah" JJ whispered "I'll call you"

Willis kissed JJ's forehead and walked out with both Strauss and Marshal Jenkins.

"She's gone and I let her down." JJ put the file on her lap and opened the heart shaper locked and inside sat a picture of her and Jess. They were sat on some grass surrounded by colorful balloons that said 'Happy birthday". It was the Birthday that JJ was destroyed beyond repair. "I'm sorry. It was all my fault" She whispered.

There was a knock at the door and at the same time JJ could feel her stomach turning and she was going to be sick. She ran to the door and flew past almost knocking Hotch over in the process and into the toilets.

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><p>The team watched JJ run into the toilets; Garcia went to follow but was held back by Rossi.<p>

"I think she needs a few minutes"

"Does anyone know what that was about?" Hotch asked still trying to process what he just saw.

The team all shook their heads and went to sit at the desks in the Bullpen. They wanted to give JJ some space.

"I think someone should go and find her." Reid said from his chair where his glance hadn't left the bathroom door.

"I'll go." Emily got up from her seat but before she could take a step the bathroom door opened to show JJ. She was as pale as a ghost with puffy red eyes from where she had been crying. She was also clutching a folder tightly to her chest. When JJ walked out she didn't look up at the team, she didn't even look up from the floor, she just walked off to her office and closed the door behind her.

"We need to find out what's going on." Morgan took the first step and the rest of them followed towards JJ's office.

Morgan reached the door and gently knocked. When they got no reply they listened closer and could hear JJ's sobs.

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><p><strong>AN so how was that?i thought it was ok but thats only my opponion **

**Please Review for me and tell me if there is anything wrong or if you just liked it.**

**AJ x**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N MORE, MORE, MORE**

**AJ x**

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><p>JJ closed her office door and a soon as she sat down on her chair, she broke down. She was so angry with herself for leaving Jess, fuming at the people that were meant to protect her but obviously didn't and then boiling with rage at the monster that caused it all in the first place. JJ stood and took out her anger on a stack of files piled on her desk. Her arms went flying at them and they scattered on the floor, paper going everywhere. With the locket still in her fist and the file in her hand JJ crashed to her knees sobbing into her hands.<p>

"Jayje are you…." Morgan was first through the door closely followed by Emily and the others. Upon seeing the distraught blonde they both rushed to her side and Emily pulled her close to her chest, comforting JJ as best she could

"Baby girl, what happened? What's going on?" Morgan rubbed her arm as another form of comfort. JJ didn't answer him but curled into Emily more. The team looked at each other, the fear obvious upon all of their faces. What had Strauss told her to cause this kind of reaction they all wondered as JJ's sobs turned into silent tears.

After another minute JJ sat up and wiped her face finally pulling her self back together a little bit. Hotch lowered himself down to JJ's level on the floor and rested him self on the balls of his feet.

"JJ what's going on?" He asked in a rarely heard soft voice.

With Emily's hand resting on her lower back for comfort and support JJ answered "I'm sorry" in a whisper. Although she said sorry she didn't know what for. Was it for completely breaking down in front of them or for lying to them all for so long? She didn't know.

"You have nothing to be sorry for angel, just tell us what's hurting you so much." Garcia joined Morgan, Hotch and Emily on the floor with JJ.

"I…I can't" JJ shook her head refusing to hurt the people she cared so much for.

"Please let us help you with what ever it is, we just…" Reid was cut off by Hotch shaking his head at him. Hotch knew JJ wasn't going to tell them if they just asked. He noticed JJ's left hand held so tight in a fist that her nickels had gone white. He reached for her hand and when she didn't move it away he held it.

"JJ what's in your hand?" He asked circling his thumb on her wrist. He looked in her eyes and could see a battle going on.

She didn't want to tell them, she didn't want to see the disgust in their eyes but then she knew she was never going to be able to avoid it now no matter how hard she tried none of them were going to let her just get up and leave.

JJ locked eyes with Hotch and slowly started to open her hand reviling the long silver chain with a heart locket attached. Hotch pulled it from her fingers and opened it to reveal a picture of two children.

"Who are they JJ?" Rossi asked leaning over Hotch's shoulder looking at the pictures.

"It's me and my baby sister." JJ whispered as Hotch handed the locket to the others to look at.

"But JJ you don't have a little sister." By now Hotch and all the others thought JJ was having some kind of mental breakdown "You had a big sister who committed suicide when you were a teenager. Remember?"

"No that was a lie. It was all a lie. I'm sorry" JJ was looking at the floor she didn't want to look at any of them and see what they were thinking

"That's my baby sister and…erm…and she's…she's dead." Tears stained JJ's face again as she struggled to admit it.

"Is that what Strauss and the United States Marshals came to talk to you about?" Hotch asked treading carefully.

"Yes." JJ answered looking into Hotch's eyes. As he looked back he could see a wall go up in JJ's eyes and all of a sudden she got to her feet causing Emily and Morgan to jump back as they were close to either side of JJ.

"Jayje are you ok?" Emily placed her hand on JJ's lower back again.

"Yes I…I erm…need to make some phone calls, some arrangements for her funeral." JJ walked over and picked up her phone which had landed in the floor with the other files.

"Ok JJ, you do that, we will be just outside the door if you need us." Hotch guided the others out the room as JJ sat at her desk and dialed a number.

Hotch pulled the door so it was still open a crack and turned to the worried looking team in front of him.

"I'm not a profiler so does someone want to explain to me what is going on with my buttercup." Garcia asked in a panic.

"Honestly I don't know. I think…" Hotch turned his head and looked at JJ threw the gap in the door "She'll tell us when she's ready until then we'll just have to watch, keep an eye on her and be there for what ever she needs."

"She's defiantly hiding something." Rossi walked to his office with one final glance at JJ.

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><p>JJ dialed an oddly familiar number and held it to her ear. Deep down she didn't want anyone to answer the phone because then it would mean that both worlds had finally collided.<p>

The ringing on the other end stopped and a comforting voice answered.

"Peter Scarbrow." The man said. JJ took a deep. Many times JJ dialed the same number but bottled it before anyone could answer and she always hung up, but not now. Now she had to do this for Jess.

"Peter…" JJ almost whispered sounding just as broken as she did all those years ago.

"Shelby…is that you?" He would recognise that little lost voice anywhere.

"Hi." More tears were falling down JJ's face.

"Oh Shel, I'm so glad to hear from you. Are you ok?" The worry was obvious in the man's voice. He could hear JJ sniff on the other end of the phone "Shelby, What is it? What's wrong?"

"She's dead peter" It took all of JJ's strength to tell the man she had seen as a father what was wrong "Jess is dead."

"No…" Peter whispered both lines were silent for a few minutes "I'm so sorry Shel."

"Erm…" JJ came right out with her question "I was wondering if…if I could bury her at Horizon. She always loved it there and it was the only place I ever saw her truly happy after….Erm…"

"It's ok Shel. You don't have to explain. I think it's a great idea and I think Sophie would too." Peters reassuring voice lifter a tiny bit of weight of JJ shoulders.

"Thankyou peter"

"Don't mention it. When are you going to get here?"

"Erm" JJ took a few seconds to think about it. She was going to say that evening but she had something she needed to do first "Tomorrow afternoon or maybe the next morning if that's ok."

"Yeah that's fine." You could hear peters sad smile down the phone "I guess I had better go and find Sophie."

"Ok I'll let you go. Oh erm…" JJ paused and looked at the photo on her desk. It was a picture of the whole team taken on one of their few evening's out "I might have some friends with me, is that ok?"

"Of course it is. We'll see you in a few days then."

"Yeah. Goodbye Peter."

"C Ya soon Shel and take care of your self for me ok."

"I will." JJ hung up the phone and rested her head on her desk. When she woke up that morning she didn't expect it to turn out like this.

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><p><strong>AN Im planning on putting the next oneup tomorrow. Review for cyber love!**

**AJ x**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N Im glad i changed it all round. i have had more hits in the past 12 hours than i did in a week, so THANKYOU!**

**AJ x**

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><p>JJ walked out of her office and into the Bullpen towards her group of friends who were sat round their desks.<p>

"Hey Jayje." Morgan stood from his desk "How you doing?"

"I'm not sure." She wasn't going to lie to them anymore, she had spent years doing it and plus in all honesty she was giving up caring if they thought she was weak. Soon they were going to find out how broken and disgusting she was anyway "Erm Hotch" JJ turned to her boss but didn't look at him "I was wondering if I could get some time off?"

"Strauss has given us all a few weeks off." JJ looked up at him for the first time since she walked into the room with a confused stare "Strauss said you might need our support." Hotch put a reassuring hand on JJ shoulder. He could see in JJ's eyes that she wasn't the same woman he was talking to that morning. Her eyes seemed to dull a little.

"Oh right ok…" JJ looked at the rest of the team. She just wanted to get this whole week over with as fast as possible "Listen guys I…" JJ was stopped by Rossi's hand on her shoulder and Hotch's look.

"You don't have to tell us anything till your ready JJ." Hotch said then Rossi continued "And we will all be right here when you are."

JJ looked at the others and they all nodded in agreement. Garcia walked over to JJ with tears in her eyes and pulled JJ into a hug. Tears filled her eyes again but she pushed them back. She couldn't break down again there was too much to do.

"What's happening next JJ?" Emily asked as she appeared by JJ side.

"Erm, I called some friends and they said it was ok to burry Jess there at Horizon but there something I have to do first."

"What's Horizon JJ" Reid asked it was an unsaid rule between the team not to profile each other but under the circumstances all of the profilers were..

"It's the school Jess and I went to as teenagers" JJ wasn't going to go into detail about the school and what they did there "She loved it there."

"Ok when do we leave?" Morgan asked pulling out his Go bag from under his desk "And before you say anything baby girl we are ALL coming with you. No arguments"

JJ let out a small laugh but it quickly turned to a frown when she realized that once they all found out what she was they were never going to want to be round her let alone make her laugh.

"Erm…Yeah." JJ pushed those thoughts to the back of her mind. She had the Next 24 hours to deal with first "We'll leave this evening. It's a long drive up there and I need to make a stop on the way if that's ok with you all?"

They all nodded and Garcia and Emily hugged her again.

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><p>JJ woke the next morning after no more that two hours sleep in a gritty motel room. She knew the next few hours were going to be some of the hardest she would face, but she had no choice.<p>

JJ had sat in bed for a few hours when her phone rang.

"Jareau." She yawned.

"Hey Jayje its Em, did I wake you?"

"No. What's up?" JJ shifter in the bed a little.

"I just wanted to make sure you were doing ok and let you know we have to be out of the rooms in 30 minutes."

"I'm fine and I'll meet you at the cars soon." With out another word she snapped her phone closed.

JJ Took a shower scrubbing her body raw, changed quickly and then went out to the 7 seat SUV.

Morgan and Rossi were leaning against the car wearing casual jeans and button up shirts. Emily and Reid stood to their right, Reid looked like Reid in his normal cardigan and Emily was wearing a red buttoned up blouse with tight fitting jeans. Garcia was stood to their left wearing her normal birghtly coloured dress with a flower in her hair. JJ was about to walk over to them when a hand touched her shoulder making her jump out of her skin.

"Sorry JJ. Are we all set?" Hotch apologized for making her jump and took JJ's bag and placed it in the back of the car. He was wearing one of his many suits but to seem less formal he wasn't wearing a tie. JJ gave a tired smile and everyone started to climb in.

"Right where we heading?" Hotch put the key in the ignition and the car rumbled.

JJ ruffled round in her jean pocket and pulled out a slip of paper with an address scribbled on it.

"To my Mother's" The only emotion heard in JJ voice was the slight hint of fear. The team looked at JJ with shock and worry as she sighed and looked out the window when the full SUV pulled out the parking lot.

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><p>3 hours later The SUV pulled up outside an average sized white two floor house on the outskirts of a town. They all sat in silence waiting for JJ to do or say something and could see her trembling from the front seat as she looked up at the house with pure fear in her eyes. Emily who was sat in the seat behind JJ lent forward and put a hand on her shoulder making her jump and pull away from Emily's touch. Emily pulled her hand away quickly.<p>

"I'm sorry." JJ whispered as she saw a hint of hurt in her eyes.

"It's ok Jayje. Do you want one of us to come in with you?" Emily asked with a reassuring smile.

"No its ok, I need to do this by myself." JJ undid her seatbelt and opened the door.

"Ok we'll be right her when your finished." JJ climbed out of the car and handed another slip of paper.

"That's the address of Horizon, Can you have it ready for when I come back?" JJ asked her voice was shaking a little as well as her body.

"Sure" Hotch took the paper "And take your time, we're not going anywhere." JJ gave him a reassuring smile and slammed the door closed.

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><p>JJ took a slow walk up to the house, her house, the one that held her nightmares. She reached the steps and almost turned round back to the car, she almost ran away again. But she stopped, she had to this for Jess, she didn't want to face the woman that knew everything but she had no choice. Jess and their mother got along really well; they had the relationship that JJ always wanted with their mother. What ever happened to her and Jess their mother had every right to say her last good bye.<p>

JJ reached the top of the steps and knocked on the door. The few seconds that it took for the door to be answered seemed like hours. JJ could feel the butterfly's in her stomach. She was scared to see her mother again but most of all she was scared to step foot in that house again. The old rusty door handle turned and the door opened to show a woman in Jeans and a house coat. She had short, curly blonde hair and Brown eyes completely opposite to JJ's.

"Shelby?" The woman also known as Alice Blaine to her friends stood in the door way her face covered with shock.

"Hey." JJ looked up at her mother. Her hands crossed over her chest trying to protect her self from the memories slipping back into her mind. Alice pulled JJ threw the door and in to a big bear hug.

"I'm so glad your alive, we thought you were dead." Alice pulled back and examined her daughter "Look at you. You look so good, so healthy. How have you been?" Alice guided JJ into the living room.

"I've been ok thanks, mum we need to talk."

"What have you been up to?" Alice asked completely ignoring what JJ said.

"I work for the FBI now."

"FBI! That's brilliant! Wait till Jess hears." JJ felt her heart miss a beat at the mention of her sister.

"Mum listen there some news I have to tell you." JJ sat on the couch and pulled her mother down with her.

"Ok" Alice looked at her daughter waiting for her to speak. JJ opened her mouth for the words to come out but was interrupted.

"Honey, There are FBI outside saying you have company, who…." A man walked into the living room. He looked to be about 60 with grey hair. He was wearing a checkered shirt and faded blue Jeans. When JJ saw her man she thought her heart was going to burst out of her chest. It was him, the man that hurt her and Jess for years. That man that stood in front of JJ was the reason that Jess was dead.

"Shelby" The man whispered looking over the shaking and frightened blonde "Kitten is that you."

At the use of the nickname she hated so much JJ snapped out of her trance.

"Don't you dare call me that." She turned to Alice "How could you!" JJ almost yelled.

"You don't understand. Walt was sick; He didn't mean to do those things to either of you." Alice looked at her husband, the step father to her girls and took a step towards JJ who stepped back.

"I don't understand?" JJ was fuming at her mother and petrified of the man that stood feet away from her "NO! The only thing I don't understand is how you could take him back after what he did to us."

"Kitten, listen to me." JJ visibly shuddered at the use of that name again. Walt took a few steps towards JJ. She put her hand on her gun and said "If you take another step towards me I will shoot you."

He put his hands up in surrender and didn't move further "I can't even look at you right now, you disgust me!" She looked at her mother.

"Don't talk to me like that Shelby!" Her mother was getting angry "He's not the reason you're such a screw up; he took care of you."

"NO!" She couldn't believe her mother was saying these things to her "He didn't take care of me, I took care of my self the best way I could. He IS they reason I'm a screw up and he's also the reason Jess is dead." JJ saw her mother visibly pail.

"What…no she can't be…" Walt went over to Alice and supported her.

JJ cringed slightly she could feel Shelby start coming to the surface and forced her back down. That wasn't the way she wanted to tell her mother.

"That's why I came; to tell you she's gone." JJ's refused to make eye contact with her monster "I wanted to let you know that I'm burying her at Horizon this weekend. It's the one place she felt safe."

Alice looked up at her remaining daughter with anger in her eyes.

"How do you know where Jess felt safe? You haven't been round for the last 10 years." Walt's let go of Alice and she took a step towards JJ "It's not Walt's fault she dead, it's yours!" Alice spat.

JJ wasn't going to sit round and be told what she already knew so she took one last look at her furious mother and walked towards the door. When she reached the bottom step and glanced at the SUV loud voices came from behind her. Alice came flying out the door. JJ turned to look at her.

"If you hadn't have left, Jess wouldn't have been the way she was. If you had stuck it out she would be alive right now. Its you're FAULT!" Alice screamed with Wilt standing behind her. He was looking at JJ. It was a look she remembered from her childhood. He was wearing the same look every night when he would come into her bedroom.

Tears trickled down JJ's cheeks for the first time that day and she turned without a word towards her friends who were stood outside of the car listening to the shouting.

"YEAH! GO ON SHELBY RUN! RUN AWAY LIKE YOU ALWAYS DO! AS FAR AS IM CONCERENED YOU KILLED HER" Alice was pulled into the house by Walt and the door closed behind them.

JJ reached the SUV with tears staining her face.

"Buttercup are you ok?" Garcia asked her best friend.

JJ didn't say a word, she didn't even register someone was talking to her; she was zoned out unable to control her tears and fear. JJ walked round to the other side of the car, got in, put her seat belt on and just stared at the road not making any contact with the team. A few seconds they joined her in the car without a word and drove off to their next destination.

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><p><strong>AN There it and the next chapter shoul be up on wednesday or thursday. i hope you are liking it and theill beat the school in thnext chapter.**

**Review for cyber love and good Karma!**

**AJ x**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N Its kind of fun writing this! I know i said it wouldnt be up till tomorrow but, hey i know you wont complain.**

**AJ x**

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><p>"Sure" Hotch took the paper "And take your time, we're not going anywhere." JJ gave him a reassuring smile and slammed the door closed.<p>

They all watched as JJ walked up to the house. She was shaking and her steps were cautious again it didn't take a profiler too tell that JJ was petrified going into her old house.

"I really worried about her." Garcia stated from her seat in the middle row.

"I know baby girl, we all are." Morgan reached over from the seat behind and massaged her shoulders to relax her obvious tense body.

They all sat with their own thoughts till Emily opened the door.

"I need some air." Emily got out of the car followed by Rossi.

"So do I." It was then that everyone got out and lent against the side doors.

"I don't know" Reid just looked at the house "If it was the old JJ, I would say she was having some sort of heart to heart with her mother, but this JJ. Who knows?"

An old light blue pick up truck pulled into the drive and out climbed an old looking man with a bag over his shoulder. He saw the team.

"Can I help you?" He asked walking over to them.

Hotch walked forward to address the man "I'm Agent Hotchner, This is my team."

"Walter Blaine." Walt shook Hotch's hand "so why is a bunch of FBI out side my house, Its only myself and my wife that live here."

"One of out collogues is talking to your wife sir, you might like to go and join them." Hotch gave the man a small smile.

"Ok, well it was nice to meet you." Walt shifted his bag round on his shoulder and walked to the house.

"Garcia." Hotch didn't avert his eyes from the man now walking into the house.

"Yes sir?"

"Did you bring you laptops?" Hotch asked now turning to look at the team.

"Of coarse sir, I never leave home without my babies." Garcia said with a little pride in her voice "Do you want me to get one out now?" Hotch nodded at her.

"Why? What are you thinking Hotch?" Asked Rossi pushing off the car. Garcia pulled one of her laptops out of her bag and rested it in Morgan's arms. She opened it and started tapping away.

"Just some hunches." Hotch handed the slip of paper he was still holding to Garcia "Look up this place for me please."

Garcia started tapping away again.

"Is that the place were going next?" Emily asked standing next to Garcia watching what she was doing.

"Yes." Was all Hotch said.

"Ok, it says… Mt. Horizon High School is sanctuary for troubled teens. Set high in the mountains of the Northwestern United States, Horizon's rigorous schedule of outdoor sports — mountain climbing, bikingm rafting etc. — gave students the confidence to face their personal issues/struggles with different forms of….." Garcia stopped reading.

"Different forms of what baby girl?" Morgan asked as he couldn't see the screen to read why she stopped.

"Different forms of addiction, abuse and disorders." Reid finished what Garcia couldn't.

"So dose that mean JJ was either an addict, had a disorder or was…was abused." Garcia's hands started to shake at the hell her friend had been through.

"Or all three." Reid added and Garcia turned and buried her head in Emily's shoulder.

"REID!" Morgan shouted and pointed to Garcia.

"Sorry Garcia." He pattered her on the back. Garcia lifted her head and wiped her tears from under her orange glasses.

"It's ok." Garcia seemed to pull herself together quickly.

"What else dose it say Pen?" Emily asked.

"Ok where was I…"

"Guys." Rossi was watching JJ come out of the house.

"We can finish later Pen." Emily put a hand on Garcia's shoulder as Morgan closed the laptop. They all turned to see JJ look at them and walk back to the car till her mother came flying out the door. None of them could hear much of what the woman was saying till she yelled.

"YEAH! GO ON SHELBY RUN! RUN AWAY LIKE YOU ALWAYS DO! AS FAR AS IM CONCERENED YOU KILLED HER"

"Did she just blame JJ for her sister's death?" Reid asked with shock written across his face.

"Yep and she just called JJ, Shelby." Morgan added.

"Buttercup are you ok?" Garcia asked her best friend with a worried smile.

JJ didn't seem to hear Garcia's question and climber into the car.

"How could you blame one daughter for the others death?" Emily asked looking at JJ through the window.

"I don't know, but its obvious JJ is hiding something big. We don't know any of the reasons JJ left home and changed her name, changed her whole life." Hotch said with a sigh.

"Hotch! You don't believe JJ is the cause of her sister's death?" Emily asked looking shocked and slightly angry at her boss.

"No! No I don't. Honestly I'm just concerned about what she's hiding." They all climbed into the SUV and left for the long drive to Mt. Horizon.

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><p>The car was silent. Morgan was sat in the back with his headphones on listening to music trying to figure out what was going on with JJ. Reid was sat next to him reading the 10th and last book he had brought with him, in front of him sat Rossi, he was writing in his notebook all the things that JJ had said and done over the last few days to try and figure her out. Emily and Garcia were sat next to him leaning on each other secretly praying that they hadn't lost the JJ they all loved. Hotch was sat in the drivers seat concentrating on where he was going and in the passenger seat sat JJ. She stopped crying after 30 minutes leaving her mothers and stared out the window in her own thoughts. Know one had tried to speak to her, they thought it was best to let JJ sort out whatever she needed to in her head, and that's what she did. She kept going over the same things in her head.<p>

She wanted to tell the team her secrets, she really did. JJ hated lying to them but on the other hand once they found out she would have to leave again. She loved her life at the BAU, she loved her family and her job, she was finally happy. JJ knew once they found out things would never be the same again. Shelby is who she was. Shelby was the voice inside her head that pointed out everything she did wrong and every failure that awaited her. Shelby reminded JJ of everything that was taken from her, her innocence, her self-respect and even her confidence and ability to trust. She thought with her mask of JJ that she had all those things back again and everything would finally be 'normal' and they were for a while. But with Shelby Merrick it was just one disaster after another.

Emily looked over at the SATNAV it said that they would be there soon and she as well as everyone wanted to know a little more about the place they were staying.

"JJ" Emily called to see if JJ would answer.

"Yeah." JJ did in a whisper. Rossi closed his notebook. Garcia sat up, Reid put his book down and Morgan shut off his music so they could all listen to the voice they missed so much.

"I was just wondering, what's Horizon?" Emily asked with caution she had to word what she asked carefully, the wrong word could push JJ further.

JJ sat still looking out the window for a second thinking of the best way to answer without giving too much away.

"Mt. Horizon is a sanctuary, it's a safe place"

"For what?" Hotch asked from the seat next to her. He took a quick glance at JJ and could see her laughing.

"Life…" Their hearts melted a little, they didn't think they would hear JJ laugh again for a long time.

"What's funny Jayje?" Garcia asked.

"I sound like Peter and Sophie." JJ smiled at the memory of the couple she saw as parents.

"Who are Peter and Sophie?" Rossi asked now.

"Sophie was my group counselor and Peter was like the head teacher of the school. He was a blood hound, he could smell drugs a mile off and a human lie detector. You couldn't get away with much at this place." They were all glad JJ was starting to open up to them and none of them wanted her to stop so they kept asking questions.

"What else is Horizon like?" Emily asked.

"You get sent to Horizon when you mess up in the real world," She stopped, JJ wanted to tell them about it but had to word it carefully she wasn't ready to tell them everything yet "It's a wilderness therapy school, it's the safest place I have ever been."

"What kind of things did you do there?" Reid asked from the back.

"You learnt a lot" It was obvious JJ didn't want to go into too much detail but Reid was going to push a little.

"Like what?"

"I learnt self respect, and how to take care of myself… we were taught how to read a map, solve problems, repel down mountains and I learned how to canoe and kayak," She paused thinking about what else she could say without giving away too much "I learned how to trust people, how to build a fire, how to chop wood, how to express myself, and take pride in my abilities."

"WOW you learnt a lot." Morgan said and they all let out a small chuckle.

"I wouldn't be possible if it wasn't for Horizon." JJ sighed. Emily put a comforting hand on JJ shoulder.

They passed a big sign that said 'Mt. Horizon just ahead' JJ seemed to stiffen "Were almost there."

"Everything's going to be ok JJ. We'll be right there with you."

'You wont be for long' JJ thought to her self as the wooden buildings appeared threw the trees.

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><p><strong>AN I hope its all ok and you can understand the story line.**

**Review for cyber love and good Karma!**

**AJ x**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N We get to see Peter and Sophie for the first time**

**AJ x**

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><p>The dark SUV pulled up to one of the Small lodges. The whole school seemed to be surrounded by woods and a large lake.<p>

"JJ" Morgan had a curious look on his face "what's the real reason you're scared of the woods?" JJ turned to look at Morgan with what looked like a smile on her face. She remembered the story she had told Morgan and Reid and the convocation they had.

"It reminded me of all the good things I left behind and I didn't want to remember, I wanted to forget about this life, the good and the bad."

JJ took one last look at the woods around her from the front seat and got out taking a deep breath trying to calm her shaky nerves. JJ looked up at the resection and her mind was flooded with memories of the place she once called home.

The others climbed out with her, Emily walked up to JJ's left she was about to say saw something when a man with salt and pepper hair and a blonde woman came almost running out the office door. JJ took a few steps forward away from Emily and the man and woman stopped in front of her. The three of them stood in silence for a full minute just looking at each other. Garcia and Emily shared an odd look.

"Shelby, is it really you?" The blonde woman broke the silence.

"Yeah, it's me soph." JJ sniffed. Both the man and the woman pulled JJ into a bone crushing hug. JJ didn't protest like she normally would when held that tight, she was just relieved to be held by people that knew what and who she really was. She had always felt somewhat safe in their arms. They all palled apart, the man pressed a soft kiss on the top of JJ's head and the woman cupped JJ's face with her hands.

"Peter told me what happened Shel, I'm so sorry." The woman pulled JJ into another hug.

"Yeah so am I." JJ whispered so only the man and woman could hear. The hug was broke and peter rubbed JJ's arm.

"How are you holding up?"

"I'm fine." JJ sighed feeling exhausted.

"C'mon Shelby, you know how much I hate those two words." JJ let out a little giggle because she knew how right peter was but before she could answer she was startled by someone clearing their throat behind the three.

"Oh sorry guys." JJ turned to the team "Everyone this is Peter Scarbrow and Sophie Becker " JJ turned Sophie "Or is it Sophie Scarbrow now." She asked with a twinkle in her eye.

"I kept my last name." Sophie smiled at JJ, who nodded and turned back to the others.

"Peter, Sophie this is my boss SSA Aaron Hotchner and then there's SSA David Rossi, SSA Derek Morgan, SSA Emily Prentiss, Reid and last Penelope Garcia the rest of the team." Peter and Sophie shook hands with every member of the team.

"It's nice to meet you all, were just sorry it's under different circumstances." Peter said with a sad smile.

"So you're all with the FBI?" Sophie asked looking at Garcia. Pen wasn't your normal looking FBI agent by and standards with her brightly coloured cloths and glasses.

"Yes we all work for the BAU. I'm their resident technical analyst." Sophie smiled at Garcia's answer.

"And you too Shel?" Peter asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Yep, me too." JJ shrugged her shoulders.

"That's fantastic Shelby. See I always said you would do something great." Peter hugged her then pulled back when he saw something on Hotch's hip "Erm…I don't mind you carrying those" He tittles his head towards the guns "But I would prefer if you kept them out of the sight of the kids."

"Its ok, we all hand ankle holsters we can wear." Hotch said understanding. From what he had been told and the small amount of research they had done he knew that this was no place for a stack of loaded guns.

"Thankyou." Peter gave him a wide smile but couldn't clear the exhaustion on his face.

Clouds rumbled over head and the sky darkened a little.

"Let's grab your bags and head inside."

They all scrambled to the car and then into the office.

The team put their bags down on a pile and sat down in the seating area.

"Jayje are you ok?" Reid asked the blonde. Peter and Sophie looked at each other with confusion then a little understanding.

"Yeah." She replied then seeing her old counsel's look at each other, JJ quickly asked them over before either of them could ask why they called her JJ "Erm…Peter, Soph can I talk to you over here for a minute?" JJ stood by the desk biting her lip waiting for an answer. Both Peter and Sophie nodded and joined her. They could see in JJ's eyes that she was trying to figure out what to say so Peter helped her along.

"They don't know, do they?" Peter asked. JJ nodded her head as an answer and looked at the floor. Peter turned to the team.

"Shall I find someone to show you to your dorm? I'm sure it's been a long drive and a longer few days" Peter said with a sad smile.

"Yes please they would be great." Hotch and the others stood up.

"Ok. Erm…Amy" Peter waved a skinny brunet over from the other side of the room.

"What?" She spat.

"I want you to take our guests to the old cliff hanger dorm please." Peter asked politically.

"Why should I?" Amy said with attitude and turned to walk away.

"Because your already on shuns for a week, do you want to make it two." Peter gave Amy a look JJ knew so well. It was his im-being-serious-but-if-you-don't-want-to-you-don't-have-to-but-face-the-consequences look.

"Fine. Follow me." Amy said threw gritted teeth and walked towards the door. The team started to grab their bags.

"Dose she remind you of anyone?" Sophie asked JJ loud enough for the team to hear and give odd looks at JJ who was glaring at Sophie.

"I will send someone to get you when its dinner." Peter ignored the looks everyone was giving each other.

"That would be great Thankyou." Emily walked up to JJ and handed her bag over "Are you coming JJ?"

"I'll be along in a few minutes. I want a quick word with them." JJ tipped her head towards the counselors.

"Ok." Emily rubbed JJ's arm and followed the others out the building.

A few minutes later JJ was sat in an office she thought she would never be in again, especially with Peter and Sophie.

"So how you holding up lost girl?" Peter asked sitting on the edge of his desk.

"Lost girl?" JJ raised an eyebrow.

"It's what some of the other Cliff Hangers started calling you after you ran." Sophie took a seat next to JJ.

"I didn't run Sophie." JJ sighed.

"No? Then what would you call it?"

"I just…" JJ didn't want to call it running but she had no other word for it.

"Ran."

"I did didn't I?" Tears started to well in JJ's eyes again. Sophie nodded her head and pulled JJ in for a hug. Peter moved from his desk and sat on the coffee table in front of the two women.

"C'mon, we can leave that stuff for later." Peter patted his wife's leg as both she and JJ wiped their eyes for the fresh tears.

"Yeah later…so what do they know?" Both Sophie and Peter looked at JJ.

"Nothing. As far as they know my name is Jennifer Jareau, I grew up with a perfect little family in Pennsylvania and I got an athletic scholarship to the University of Pittsburgh." JJ sighed.

"Oh Shelby." Peter ran a hand threw his hair. He reminded JJ of Hotch so much it scared her a little.

"I know now I did the wrong thing but at the time, I thought it was my only option and now I have to find some way of telling them who and what I really am. Their JJ's family, they only know who JJ is, they know nothing of Shelby."

"You have to tell them Shel. I expect their already starting to put things together. They all look like a group of very smart people." Sophie look worried at the way JJ was talking like she was two different people.

"They are" JJ smiles "I'm exhausted guys, can we finish this later? I want to get a shower in before dinner."

"Sure. Go on, you know the way." Peter said with a smile and received one back from JJ. She picked up her bag and opened the door "Oh Shel…" JJ turned and looked at peter "It's really good to have you back."

"Its good to be back my captain." JJ walked out and closed the door behind her.

Peter pulled Sophie into a hug; she rested her head in his chest.

"This is going to be a tough few days in Shelby."

"It's going to be tough on all of us." Peter planted a kiss on the top of her head. They pulled apart when the phone rang. Peter answered it.

"Hello" Peter sat on the edge of the desk "Yeah she's here" Sophie could only hear one side of the convocation "Ok we'll see you soon."

Peter hang up the phone and pulled Sophie into another hug.

"They'll be here in 5." He sighed

"Do you think we should have told her the others will be here soon?" Sophie asked Peter as they hugged.

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><p><strong>AN if you have any questions just ask and i will PM you. The next chapter you will the old Cliff Hangers and there will be some yelling. As this is extra long you i wont be posting the next chapter till monday or sunday i'll see how far i am.**

**Review for cyber love and good Karma!**

**AJ x**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N im not even half way threw yet**

**AJ x**

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><p>Amy slammed the door to the Cliff Hanger lodge closed behind her.<p>

"Well she seemed pleasant." Rossi scoffed throwing his bag down on a bed.

"I wonder what she's here for." Reid wondered out loud looking at the closed door.

"What are you talking about genius?" Garcia asked.

"Well the reason all these kids are here is because of addiction, abuse and disorders. I was just wondering what category she falls under."

"Reid, I think you that's one of those questions you shouldn't ask while were here." Hotch placed his bag on the one next to Rossi's. Spencer was the smartest person he had ever met but his people skill lacked…a lot.

They unpacked their bags and sat on the beds in their own thoughts.

"Baby girl, you ok?" Morgan asked Garcia from across the room. She was sat in the middle of the bed with her laptop rested on her legs just staring at the screen. Morgan got up and joined her. Everyone else either sat up or turned to watch them.

"What you doing baby girl." He looked at the screen and say that she had typed the name 'Shelby Merrick' into one of her search boxes. But her finger was hovering over the send button "Penelope, Who's Shelby Merrick?" Morgan had a feeling he didn't need to ask that question.

"JJ is Shelby Merrick." She handed him a picture and the others joined her near the bed "This was on the floor next to the bed when we came in." Garcia pointed to the blonde girl in the picture. The girl's eyes were sunken and haunted. She was skinny and looked lost. "That's JJ; the names are on the back in order and it says that girl is Shelby" The team scanned the picture for a moment "I'm scared were loosing our gumdrop and I want to find out what she's hiding but I don't want to betray her trust."

"Then don't." A cold voice came from the other end of the room making everyone jump.

JJ walked over to the team surrounding Garcia, dropped her bag and took the picture from Morgan's hand.

"I remember this." JJ smiled at another memory "I was such a bitch to everyone. I refused to get close to anyone, to trust anyone because I thought if I let them in that they would hate what they saw and would leave me, so I kept them all away with my attitude." JJ sighed and gave the photo back "Please don't Pen. There are things in there that I don't think I'm ready for you to know just yet." JJ looked at her best friend with pleading eyes. Garcia nodded and closed the laptop. She didn't want to read about it, she wanted to hear about it from JJ.

"Thankyou." JJ picked her bag up and looked at the whole team gathered on one bed "So which ones mine?"

Rossi pointed to the bed last bed in the corner "That one."

"Of course it is." JJ sighed and laughed.

"What is it JJ?" Hotch asked standing up next to her.

"That was my bed when I was here." JJ laughed at how ironic the situation was becoming and walked over to it.

"We can swap if you want to Jayje." Emily offered.

She just shook her head then dropped her bag on the bed.

"Morgan will you give me a hand please?" JJ didn't move her gaze from the top of the bed.

"Sure." He got up and walked over.

"Could you pull it out?" Morgan nodded and started to pull the bed away from the wall. JJ walked over to the wall and bent down.

"Its still here." JJ smile at the carving on the wall that said 'Shel and Jess, fighters till the end' JJ's smile faded when she saw another carving next to it 'I need to be saved from myself' in her own handwriting. JJ had forgotten she'd written that the night she left.

Emily knelt down next to her "Did you write that" She pointed to the second carving.

JJ didn't answer; she stood up with tears in her eyes and headed with her bag to the bathroom. She whispered "I need to take a shower" just loud enough for the others to hear.

They all listened for the shower to start.

"What does it say Emily?" Hotch asked.

"It says 'I need to be saved from my self'." Emily sighed and sat on her bed.

"What the hell has happened to our girl?" Garcia started to cry.

**Emily was worried for her friend. She was hiding something big and it was tearing her apart. The cracks in the mask were starting to show, soon enough it would be gone, and she would have to face her past, with nothing but the teams support to fall back on. She prayed that it was enough... it had to be or they would loose her.**

JJ spent the next 90 minutes in the shower. Burning hot water cascading down her body, she scrubbed and scrubbed till her skin was raw, till some of it bleed but still she didn't feel clean. It had been years since JJ had felt that way and she had scrubbed her body till it bleed. Sighing at the fact that cleaning herself wasn't going to make her feel any less dirty JJ washed the soap of and climbed out.

The steam poured from under the door and into the room everyone was sitting in. Reid, Hotch and Emily were reading, Morgan was playing on his IPod and Rossi and Garcia were on their laptops.

"She's been in there ages, do you think someone should check on her?" Reid asked. Before anyone answered the shower shut off and JJ stepped out wrapped in a white towel. They all stopped what they were doing and looked at her. Her eyes were puffy, her hair was dripping wet and she tiny blood drops on the top of her arms. Garcia let out a little gasp. JJ rubbed her arms to protect herself.

"Emily can I borrow your hair brush please, I think I left mine at the motel."

"Sure." Emily grabbed the brush and handed it to JJ. Emily got close enough to get a proper look at JJ's arms. Emily gave her a sympatric look and JJ walked back into the bathroom.

"Was the blood on JJ's arms?" Reid asked.

"Yes" Emily ran her hand threw her hair. Her best friend was in more trouble that she first thought.

"From what?" Reid asked again.

"She's been scrubbing her body. There were a few on her legs too." Morgan answered and that was when something clicked inside his head. He knew what was going on with JJ.

He knew some of it anyway.

JJ walked out of the bathroom, her hair dry and she had fresh cloths on. She handed Emily her brush just as there was a knock at the door.

"Come in." Morgan yelled watching JJ moving round the room.

"Hey guys sorry to interrupt." It was Peter "Dinner's ready."

"Great thanks" Hotch got of the bed he was sitting on and grabbed his jacket along with everyone else. Peter walked to the other end of the room to where JJ was putting her jacket on.

"Shel," He took a deep breath, he wasn't sure how she was going to take what he was about to say. The team stood looking at them waiting for Peter to speak. JJ looked up at him "Their all here."

"Who?" JJ started to sound panicked.

"The other Cliffhangers. I called them all after you phoned about Jess. They all wanted to come a say goodbye."

JJ stood in shock. She hadn't even thought that she might have to face her old friends.

"Peter no…i…I'm not ready, why didn't you tell me?" JJ looked hurt.

"Because we knew you'd run again. You need to face them sometime. Their not going to go away."

Garcia walked up to JJ and grabbed her hand pulling her out of her momentary trance.

"C'mon you haven't eaten all day and I doubt you ate last night." Garcia pulled JJ out the door with the others.

In that moment all the emotions and feelings she had as Shelby came jumping out of her box and overwhelmed her. She could feel Shelby starting to taking over again and this time she didn't think she could control it.

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><p>They follower Peter into the dining hall.<p>

"All the students have finished eating so it will just be you and the old Cliffhangers." Peter stopped before they entered.

"mmmmm, yum Horizon food, There's something I haven't missed." JJ laughed lightly trying not to sound as petrified as she was feeling.

"Its not that bad Shel, I've lived of it long enough." Peter folded his arms across his chest.

"That doesn't fill me with confidence my captain." Peter felt his heart swell at the use of his old nickname from her. He gave her a glare along with a smile pressed on his lips and walked in to the dining hall. JJ cautiously followed him along with the others close behind.

"SHELBY!" As soon as JJ walked through the door a tall very pregnant skinny brunet came running towards her and pulled her into a bone crushing hug.

"Hey, Jules." JJ whispered in her ear and pulled back placing a hand on her swollen belly "look at you!"

A muscular man, a dark skinned woman and another man with curly black hair came up next to the brunet.

"How you holding up lost girl?" The muscular man asked wrapping his arms round the skinny pregnant woman.

"Lost girl, really? Who came up with that?" JJ raised an eyebrow at the four people in front of her. The curly haired man raised his hand.

"Well Thankyou for that Ezra." The man known as Ezra smiled at JJ.

"Your welcome. Who are your friend's Shel?" He tipped his head to her team standing in the doorway.

"Their the people I work with. That's Agent Hotchner…" JJ would have kept going but was stopped by the dark skinned woman.

"Your FBI?" she asked, Hotch just nodded.

"And that would make you FBI as well." Ezra asked JJ who also just nodded. Ezra turned to Hotch "You gave Shelby a gun!" Ezra sounded shocked and scared at the same time.

"Oh thanks Freaken." JJ looked a little hurt at him although she could understand. They Girl he knew should NEVER be given a gun.

"Actually." Reid started to talk at the back of the group "She's the best shot on the team." Rossi put his hand on Reid's shoulder to stop him from talking.

"Really?" The muscular man looked shocked; every member of the team nodded their heads.

"Watch your back Auggie, don't piss her off." Ezra teased.

"Anyway" JJ want back to introductions "That's Agent Hotchner, Agent Rossi, Agent Morgan, Agent Prentiss, Dr. Reid and Penelope Garcia." JJ turned to the team "Guys this is" She pointed to the pregnant brunet "Juliette Waybourne" Then to the muscular man "Augie Ciceros" to the dark skinned woman "Kat Cabot, Ezra riedken….." JJ would have kept going to the other two people at the back of the room but was interrupted.

"YOU BITCH!" The angry brunet at the back of the room lunged through the small group of people landing on JJ, pushing her to the floor and hitting her round the face. Morgan, Emily, Peter and Sophie ran to them and pulled the angry brunet off JJ. Morgan held her back as Emily helped JJ of the floor.

"It's nice to see you to Daisy." JJ rubbed her jaw. The woman went to lunge for JJ again but Morgan held her back "Pull that again Dais and you will find out how far my foot goes down your throat." The woman stopped fighting "You can let go Morgan." And he did but he stayed close incase she did it again.

"And here I was thinking you might have changed." Daisy spat and went back to her spot by the window.

"You ok JJ?" Emily asked looking over the small split lip she was now sporting.

"Yeah I'm fine." JJ rubbed the bit of blood on the back of her hand.

"JJ?" The blonde man at the back for the room questioned.

"Scott i…" JJ was loosing the colour in her face fast. It broke her heart to see her first true love look so lost.

"Why did she call you JJ?" Scott asked looking confused. JJ walked closer to him.

"Because JJ's my name, well Jennifer Jareau." Scott went from looking confuses to looking angry in less than a second.

"No wonder we couldn't find you. We looked you know, we all did." JJ looked at the other Cliffhangers and they were nodding looking sad "You changed your name!" He paused and looked JJ up and down "You let him win!" He spat.

"Scott don't do this, you don't know the reasons I left. You're not allowed to judge me!" JJ was getting mad as well.

"Oh I think out of everyone in this room I'm the only one that can judge you." You could see the anger in his eyes and JJ could see he was about to say something she didn't want him too.

"Scott" JJ glanced over her shoulder at the team who were watching JJ interact with the other people "stop."

"Oh my god." Scott let out a cold laugh "They don't know do they?"

JJ gave him her best Shelby warning glare and he stopped laughing.

"Why don't you want them to find out what happened and what you did?" he asked still fuming but now it was her turn to get really mad at him.

"Before you judge me, my actions or the things I did Scott take a good look in the mirror because you're not perfect, you've made mistakes." She was too mad to think about the group of people behind her "Can you blame me for not telling them? For not telling anyone?" She got up into his face and was yelling "After the way you acted when I told you. I trusted you Scott to hold it together, to hold it together for me. And what did you do when you found out? What did you ask me SCOTT?" JJ was pushing her finger into his chest "Go on. WHAT DID YOU ASK?

"How many…" Scott whispered now feeling really bad for getting angry and causing JJ to act this way.

"With those two little words Scott you shattered every little bit of faith I had in you. I could see it in your eyes, I disgusted you. You looked at me the way I look at myself in the mirror every morning." Tears were falling down JJ's cheeks again.

"Shel, I'm sorry I didn't mean too…"

"Leave it." JJ turned and walked out the room.

"JJ come back." Emily called after her but JJ just kept going and slammed the door closed behind her.

"Well that went better than I thought it would." Peter whispered to Sophie."

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><p><strong>AN Next there will another Higher Ground person.**

**Review for cyber hugs and good Karma!**

**AJ x**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N OH you lucky people get two today and here is a nice little bit of 'group'**

**AJ x**

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><p>JJ walked round the camp grounds for 15 minutes before finally resting at the end of the docks with her feet dangling over the edge skimming the top of the water. She remembered the day he found out what she was and the look he gave her made her feel even more ashamed and dirty than she already did. You see when Shelby was with Scott she felt 'normal', like she was any old teenager that wasn't damaged or broken. As time went on Shelby started to trust him, to love him. Then came the hike up to Dog's Peak and everything changed. They started that hike and he looked at her with worry but when they got back to Horizon a few days later he looked at her like she was a dirty whore. It was at that point that Shelby Merrick swore to never tell anyone what she was ever again.<p>

"Excuse me." A young girl's voice broke JJ train of though.

"I'm sorry but I'm not up to talking much right know." JJ just stared at the sun set on the Horizon.

"That's ok, I don't mind." The girl sat on the dock next to JJ and crossed her legs looking in the same direction as JJ.

She looked over at the girl shocked. The girl looked about 17; she had olive skin and had Korean features. A Smile crossed JJ sad face when she remembered who the girl was.

"How are you Grace?" JJ looked back at the sun set.

"I'm ok Thankyou. My mum told me about your sister. I'm sorry, I really liked her. She used to read me a story when ever she came into the restaurant with some of the other's from here." Grace looked at JJ and saw a single tear run down her cheek.

"Thankyou. Jess always did love to read." JJ wiped the tear away.

They both sat in silence for a while just remembering Jess.

"I have a photo of you and the other Cliffhangers on my bedroom wall. You guys were always my favourite." JJ let out a small laugh as grace spoke "My mum used to tell me a story of something that happened when I was little. Can I tell it to you?"

JJ pulled her knees up to her chest and nodded.

"Well… Me and mum went on one of our mother, daughter camping trips and during the night I got up and went to go to the bathroom. I tried to make my way back but got lost I guess. They searched for me the whole day; Peter even got some of the students here to help look." JJ didn't need telling this story, she was there "I was brought back to my mum late that evening by Ezra. He was the Hero of the town for weeks for finding me." Grace looked at JJ "That's the story I have always been told but its not the one I remember. It wasn't Ezra that saved me from falling from that cliff." JJ looked at Grace "It was you."

"You have a good memory for a kid." JJ sighed remembering how she climbed up the cliff with only her bare hands for support and brought Grace back to safety.

"Thanks." Grace giggled "I know why you didn't take the credit for saving me and its ok…" The docks creaked behind them. They both turned to see Reid standing looking at them.

"JJ, Peter asked me to come and find you, he said something about starting group…" Reid looked a little confused at the concept of 'group'.

"Ok" JJ sighed "I will be there in a minute" Reid walked off back to the cabins.

"I had better get going" Grace stood "Mum will be wondering where I am, I'm only meant to be helping out for a few hours after school." JJ stood up to join Grace in the walk back to the cabins.

"I realised a while ago that you don't have to be scared of the shadows and what they hide because after all their just shadows they cant hurt you." JJ and Grace hugged and said their goodbyes. JJ walked towards the cabin and Grace walked down the hill.

"Oh grace…" JJ yelled back.

"Yeah?" Grace turned back to face JJ.

"You've been spending way too much time round Peter." Both women laughed and continued onto their destinations.

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><p>JJ walked into the Lodge and all eyes turned to her.<p>

"This should be fun" She muttered to herself walking over to the empty seat in between Hotch and Kat,

"bout time Jayje." Morgan lent over Hotch and whispered to her. She poked her tongue out at him.

"Ok." Peter grabbed the rooms' attention "Now Shelby had joined us" JJ visibly flinched at the use of her old name, which the small group of profilers all saw. It didn't matter how many times she heard that name it still brought back unwanted memories "We can begin."

"JEEZ!" JJ raised her hands "It's only been 5 minutes. And I didn't know about bloody group." JJ forced her self to stop and grabbed hold of the arms of the chair as hard as she could to push the parts of Shelby away that were slipping back.

They all spent the next 15 minutes telling the group who they were, what they did and at the reluctance of some of the profilers, how they were all feeling. The last person to talk was JJ.

"Ok Shel your turn." Sophie looked at JJ from her spot next to Peter.

"Ok." JJ took a deep breath and sighed. She really didn't want to do this but there was no way to get out of it "My mane is Jennifer Jareau. I live in Virginia an…."

"Group's about truth Shelby." Daisy spat from across the circle throwing daggered looks at JJ.

JJ took a glance round the circle, all the Cliffhangers as well as Peter and Sophie were nodding in agreement at what Daisy had said and her family were giving sympatric and worried looks. JJ sighed and shifted uncomfortably in her seat.

"My name is Shelby Merrick. I live in Virginia and I was sent to Horizon when my Biological father decided he couldn't deal with my 'problems' anymore." She turned to Daisy "Happy?"

"No not really!" Daisy stood from her seat.

"Daisy I don't think no is the right time." Peter grabbed her arm to hold her back but Daisy pulled herself free as JJ stood up too.

"No I think now is the perfect time! So Shel Why did you do it? Why did you run?" Daisy was getting closer and closer to JJ with each word.

"Back off Daisy!" JJ spat.

"No I want answers! You left us. You have no idea what you did to all of us…."

"What about what it did to me! I hated leaving here. It was my home, you were my family. There were so many times I wanted to leave JJ behind and just come back as Shelby but I couldn't. I couldn't live with the looks of pity you all gave me and I couldn't live with the guilt of knowing I was the reason Jess was here the way she was." JJ was as white as a sheet "I heated who Shelby was! She was broken, bad and dirty, she was beyond help but not Jennifer. JJ was good and whole. She came from a loving home and had a good life. She was everything I always wanted to be."

"We all wanted to be someone else back then! Every single one of us but we stuck with the crappy hand we were dealt. You are everything Peter and Sophie taught us not to be!"

Peter stepped in front of the screaming woman.

"Daisy STOP!" Peter yelled "Shelby doesn't need this right now."

"Don't Peter." JJ felt something inside her snap. She heard the words coming out of her mouth but she was unable to stop them "Don't try and protect me now! There were only two things I ever asked you to do for me." Peter looked at JJ in shock and the team were just as shocked they had never seen their friend this way "1. I asked you to save me and ok you couldn't because I wouldn't let you but I also asked you to look after Jess for me, I asked you to protect and save her because she wasn't as broken as I was. You didn't do a very good job of that did you? She's dead; she was murdered on the streets, killed by a John. She was back on the Streets Peter, why didn't you save HER!"

"You're not blaming Peter for this!" Daisy yelled.

"Enough all of you!" Scott stood from his seat "Daisy stop yelling at Shelby, there is a reason she ran" Scott turned his attention to JJ "and Shelby you can't blame Peter or Sophie for what happened to Jess. You of all people should know when out troubles couldn't be solved, they were our last chance. They saved us, all of us and your alive today because of them. We we're…what was it the outside world used to call us? Oh yeah a group of 'profoundly dysfunctional adolescents' and they were the only people that didn't give on up on us, even when we gave up on our self's."

Tears were streaming down Juliette and Garcia's faces and Emily and Sophie had a few staining her cheeks.

"If it's anyone's fault Shelby, its yours" Daisy whispered sitting back down in her seat. That was the point that JJ didn't try to hold back the tears she just let them fall.

"Don't you think I know that Daisy? If I had stayed, if I hadn't have ran, If I had just sucked it up and dealt with what was happening, it wouldn't have happened to Jess. But no I was weak I was a coward and I ran. I ran as far and a fast as I could away from my problems creating ones for Jess at the same time. If I could I would go back in a heart beat and change it all would but I can't. I would go back and live threw that hell to keep her safe. I thought leaving would help her deal with it all because every time I looked at her I re-lived it and that she felt the same when she looked at me. So I ran thinking if I left so would her problems. I know its not their fault" JJ pointed to Peter and Sophie "Its my fault. All of it, I'm the reason it happened, I'm the reason she had to come here, I'm the reason she ran back to the streets and I'm the reason she's dead. My baby sisters dead because of me" JJ put her head in her hands and sobbed. Scott went to hold her but she pushed him away and ran out of the room as fast as her shaky legs could carry her.

"Good Job Daisy, Nicely done." Scott got up of the floor and threw Daisy a dirty look before leaving.

Hotch, Rossi, Morgan, Emily, Reid and Garcia walked into their cabin half an hour later to hear the shower running and steam coming from under the door again.

"That's the third shower she's had today." Reid noted but now none of them look surprised. They all except for Garcia had their own idea about what had happened to JJ and none of them could blame her for showering so much.

They all got ready for bed and turned off the lights falling asleep to the sound of the shower running and the occasional sob coming from the shower room.

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><p><strong>AN what did you think of the grace bit and then the fight ith Daisy? if ou extra nice to me i will put another one up tomorrow**

**Review for cyber hugs and good Karma!**

**AJ x**


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N i do quite lie this chapter. it really shows the difference between JJ and Shelby an the fight she is having to seprate the two.**

**AJ x**

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><p>The sun peeked threw the blinds warming Morgan's face, waking him up. He climbed out of bed and looked round. Every one was asleep in their beds except for JJ. Her bed had been slept in as her covers were on the floor but she was nowhere to be seen. That was when for the first time Morgan noticed the steam coming from the shower room again.<p>

"I'm surprised there's any hot water left in this place" he muttered to himself reaching the shower room door. He gently and quietly tapped not wanting to wake the others. When he didn't get an answer he gently pushed the door open and saw in the corner sat JJ, a fluffy white town wrapped round her small body and her knees tucked under her chin.

"Oh Jayje…What are you doing to your self baby girl?" Morgan could hear her quietly sobbing as he sat on the floor next to her "Come here" He wrapped his arms round her shoulders and held her to his chest.

The sat there for a while in silence. Morgan just held JJ and she held him listening to his steady heart beat. JJ almost jumped out of her skin where there was a nock at the door.

"Is everything ok in there?" Hotch's voice moved threw the closed door.

"Yeah, we'll be out in a bit." Morgan let go of JJ as she shifted away.

"Ok." The Hotch was no longer on the other side of the door.

"How you doing?" Morgan's deep voice asked looking at JJ.

She looked up to meet his gaze "I'm sorry." She whispered and looked back down at the floor. When he looked into her bright blue eyes and could tell she was fighting a battle in her head. It hurt him to see one of his closest friends hurting so much, he whished he could make all her pain go away.

"You have nothing to be sorry for Jayje." He tipped her head up to look at him again but this time when he met her eyes, they weren't the bright blue they were a second ago, they were dark blue and seemed slightly cloudy. She had a look in her eyes that Morgan didn't recognize and it made him rather uncomfortable.

Before he knew what was happening, JJ moved in. She soft moist lips pressed against his, he froze in shock. JJ moved and straddled his lap pushing more forcefully onto his lips. Her hand trailed up and down his neck causing him to shiver. Her other hand trailed down his firm abs and along the top of his shorts, her fingers tucked under the elastic and started to pull them away. This snapped Morgan out of his trance and he grabbed both of JJ's hands.

"JJ what the hell are you doing!" He yelled.

"C'mon Derek. You know you want it. All of you do." JJ whispered and her lips pressed against his again. JJ never called him Derek; it was her way of taking her self out of the situation. Morgan pushed her back breaking them apart again.

"Stop Jayje, this isn't you." But JJ didn't stop she pushed forward again.

"Its what all men want. Don't fight it Derek."

"NO! JJ STOP!" Morgan yelled.

He looked at her and he could visibly see the change in JJ. Her eyes went from being dark and back to the bright blue ones he knew as JJ's. She realized what she was doing and crawled back off him hitting the wall behind her with a thud.

"GET OUT!" JJ screamed Morgan stood and made his way closer to JJ "NO! GET OUT! GO!" Morgan raised his hands.

"Ok, ok, I'm going." JJ was rocking back and forward with her hands over her ears. It looked like she was having a mental breakdown. JJ was hurting and in pain and there was nothing he could do. He walked out of the shower room as a tear slid down his face.

JJ sat there rocking back and forward for a good 10 minutes, muttering 'I can't be her again. I won't let her win.' To herself over and over again till she got up and changed quickly into the running gear she had in the other corner of the room. JJ slipped on her trainers and ran out of the room past the scared and worried faces. She ran out of the cabin, threw the camp and into the woods as fast as she could.

She had to get away. Run from the pain and the hurt and run she did. JJ ran until she lungs burnt and her legs shook. When she finally stopped after an hour of running none stop, she collapsed and dry heaved from the exestuation she was feeling. She lay in her back looking up at the clear blue sky remembering every feeling she had felt. It was in that moment JJ realized she had had enough of hiding and hurting the people she cared about. JJ decided that she was going to tell the team who Shelby was because secrets just got people hurt.

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><p>The others were woken from their light sleep by whispered words and the shower room door closing.<p>

"Morning beautiful crime fighters." Garcia yawned standing up and sitting on Emily's bed next to her.

"Where are Morgan and JJ?" Reid asked making his bed.

"I think their both in there." Rossi answered pointing to the closed door.

"Knock, Knock" The main door creaked open and Juliette popped her head in "I thought you all might like some coffee on this bright morning." She walked in holding a tray full of mugs in front of her large pregnant belly.

"Here" Hotch stood up and walked over to Juliette "Let me take that." Hotch took the tray and handed out the coffee.

"Oh you're a goddess." Garcia sipped her hot drink.

"I have been called many things before but that is not one of them." Juliette giggled sitting on one of the vacant chars and running a hand over her bump "So where's Shelby and Morgan?"

"They are in there, talking." Hotch walked over to the closed door and knocked "Is everything ok in there?" He got a muffled reply that know one else heard "ok" Hotch sat back down in his bed "He said they will be out in a bit." He answered before anyone could ask what Morgan had said.

"Juliette…" Reid looked at the pregnant woman, who looked up from her bump "Why were you sent here?"

"Sorry about him" Emily rolled her eyes and got out of the bed "He's our walking talking Wikipedia but he's people skills aren't up to much." Reid turned a bright shade of red.

"Its ok I don't mind. Most people just tip toe round it and it drives me mad. I don't mind talking about it; I wouldn't be who I am today if it wasn't for who I used to be." Hotch gave her a rare smile "I used to be Horizons binge-purge queen as well as the Cliffhangers resident self-harmer." They all sat and listened to Juliette's story "by the time I was sent here by my biological father, my mother was onto her 5th marriage. She wanted me to be perfect for every new man she met and when I wasn't I cut myself." Juliette sighed and rubbed her stomach.

"How did you stop?" Garcia asked finishing her coffee.

"While I was here I was taught there are other ways to deal with my frustrations and hurt other than by cutting myself. The Eating Disorder was a lot harder to change. It wasn't till I fell pregnant that I finally realized that I was willing to look after myself to protect my baby but I wasn't to protect myself. It's been hard but with Auggie's help I've hade control over it since I fell pregnant." A proud smile crossed her face.

"That's brilliant…" Garcia squeaked she would have kept going but stopped when yelling started to come from the shower room.

"NO! GET OUT! GO!" JJ's voice echoed threw the bedroom, seconds later Morgan walked out. He looked like he had just been slapped round the face.

"Morgan what's wrong?" Hotch asked. Morgan didn't reply he perched himself on the end of his bed and ran a hand over his face.

"Chocolate thunder, what's wrong?" Garcia sat on Morgan's bed and rubbed his shoulders. Still Morgan was silent.

"DEREK!" Emily yelled and got his attention "What happened?"

"I…She…" He looked at the closed door and back at Emily "Sh…sh..i..i..she." Morgan never stumbled over his words.

The team broke their stare when they could hear Juliette sigh.

"She got you didn't she?" Juliette asked. Morgan looked at her and nodded the shock still present on his face.

"What are you talking about?" Rossi asked her.

"She tried to have sex with him." Juliette let the sadness linger in her eyes. If JJ had done something like that Juliette knew she was hurting big style.

"WHAT?" Emily and Garcia yelled together.

"She did." Morgan finally spoke "Who was that?" He looked at Juliette as she stood and he pointed at the door he came out.

"You were just introduced to Shelby Merrick." Juliette walked out of the room with the empty tray leaving the others staring.

"Morgan tell us what happened in there?" Hotch asked.

"We were talking one minute and the next she changed. She didn't even look like JJ. She kissed me, I tried to push her back but she said that I like it. She said 'it's what all men want'. I yelled at her to stop and then she was JJ again. She started crying, I went to comfort her but she pushed me away and told me to leave."

They were all still trying to process what just happened when JJ came pelting out of the shower room and out of the door.

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><p><strong>AN if i dont get another one up today it wont be till wednesday as im out all of tomorrow. and in the next chapter JJ tells the team who she really is! I cant wait for you to read it! **

**Review for cyber hugs and good Karma!**

**AJ x**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N ok so i know i said that this is where she tells the team, and it was going to be but then it would have made it too long so with my hand on my heart the next chapter will have it.**

**AJ x**

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><p>When afternoon came Peter gathered all the old Cliffhangers and the BAU round the by the wood shed.<p>

"Shel's been gone hours now. I think we should split into teams and try and find her."

"I found her" Kat said from opposite Peter. Everyone looked to the tree line and saw JJ walking out towards the cabin. JJ felt eyes burning into her back and turned to see that 14 sets of eyes staring at her. Some of them looked upset, some scared but most of them looked at JJ with pity and sympathy which was one of the reasons JJ left in the first place. She shook her head and continued to the cabin.

"Do you mind if Soph and I go?" Peter turned and asked Hotch "We would like a word with her."

"Be my guest, I'm not sure we would know what to say anyway. The incident this morning…that wasn't the JJ we know"

"But it was the Shelby we know." Daisy stated.

"Thanks." Peter grabbed Sophie's hand ignoring Daisies comment and they walked together towards the cabin JJ had walked into.

They didn't bother knocking. They just went in and saw JJ sitting on her old bed with her head in her hands.

"Shelby…" Sophie took a seat next to the warn out blonde.

"Don't Sophie" JJ looked up at them "I promised my self when I became JJ that I would never do something like that ever again. This morning I became Shelby. I acted the way she used to act. I could feel the anger and hate running threw me. She took over and I couldn't stop her."

"You have to stop thinking that Shelby and JJ are different people. Their not, their both you. If you keep doing this you will loose the people out there that care for you and you'll eventually end up killing yourself." Peter sat the other side of her.

"What is this? Your form of shock therapy. I though that was my department" JJ let out a cold laugh but quickly stopped when she realized that it was Shelby talking and not JJ "I'm sorry, I…"

"You need to stop apologizing." Sophie put her arm round JJ's small shoulders "We don't know who you are anymore Shel, not really. The only people that can help you now are your team." JJ looked up at her hurt "That doesn't mean were not going to try, it just means they can help you more than we can."

"Once you tell them the truth about why you're here and what happened, you will see that they will still love you and nothing will change. They will be there for you just like we all were and still are." Peter Joined Sophie hugging JJ.

"Not everyone was there." JJ whispered.

"Scott came round though didn't he? After he thought he lost you on you're solo's he didn't care what you used to be or what happened to you. He loved you for who you were scars and all."

They stayed like that listening to the world go round outside and remembering what things used to be like back in the day.

"So are you going to tell them?" Peter asked moving down in front of JJ.

She nodded "Will you stay with me while I do?" JJ hated sounding so weak and damaged but she couldn't tell her new family alone she needed help from some of her old family.

"Of course we'll stay." Sophie hugged her tighter.

"We'll stay for as long as you need us." Peter hugged his wife and the woman he loved like his own daughter.

"Let me take a shower and then we can do this." JJ pulled away from the hug.

"Ok I'll wait here and Peter can gather them in his office, if that's ok with you?" JJ nodded her head and gathered her things heading for the shower room for the second time that day.

The smile she gave them never reached her eyes

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><p>"Am I doing the right thing?" JJ asked stopping outside Peter's office.<p>

"C'mon Shel, we talked about this. What ever happens Peter and I will be right there." Sophie held JJ's hand.

"Why could I never have a 'normal' person's life?" JJ sighed looking at the door knowing the next time she walked of the room, they would know everything about who she really was.

"Because it wasn't the hand you were dealt." Sophie winked at JJ and grabbed hold of the door handle "You ready?"

JJ took a deep breath steadying her nerves and shaking hands "I think so."

The door opened revealing Peter sitting at his desk, Emily, Garcia, Reid and Rossi sitting on the couch and Morgan and Hotch sitting on the chairs. JJ avoided eye contact with all of them except for Peter who gave her an encouraging wink. JJ sat down on the last free seat where she was able to see everyone. She could feel their eyes burning into her again. The day she had told Peter everything was one of the scariest things she had to do because it was like admitting it was real, that it had all happened and she couldn't hide from it anymore as Shelby, and now as JJ she was about to do it all over again. All she wanted to do was run and hide from it all again.

"Peter, I…" She turned to look at the man sitting at the desk.

Before she could finish he got up from his desk and knelt down in front of her, holding her hands "You can do this. You need to stop hiding from who you are. You can run and change your name but it will never change what happened and if it didn't happen you wouldn't be who you are today."

"The person I am today's not that great, She's a coward, she's weak, she's dirty and broken…" JJ didn't bother hiding her words from her family, they were going to feel the same way about her soon enough.

"No she's not. You are amazing Shel. Everything you've been threw, most people would have given up a long time ago but you didn't, you fought to keep your sanity, your life and you've done it. You have a brilliant job where you save peoples lives and you have a family that obviously love you. It took Soph and I months to break down those concrete walls you had and we still didn't get rid of all of them, please don't build more. Their not going to think of you any differently than we do. Please open up to them." Peter wiped the tear that had fallen down JJ's face with his thumb. She nodded and let out the breath she had been holding. Peter kissed her forehead and sat on the arm of her chair so she could feel a little bit safer.

None of the team had ever seen JJ so scared. Their strong, confident media liaison looked beyond broken; she looked like she was completely shattered. Her once bright blue eyes were dark, life less and sunken, her bright lips were pail with a slight hint of blue and her face was whiter than a blanket of snow. In other words Jennifer Jareau looked a mess. You didn't need to be a profiler to see that whatever had happened to JJ growing up was horrific.

Even with what Peter had said JJ was still struggling to open up. Hotch decided he was going to give her a little encouragement and hope.

"JJ" For the first time since walking into the room she made eye contact with Hotch "I want you to know that what ever it is that you're scared to tell us, it will be ok, were not going to abandon you, your one of us, one of the family and nothing will ever change that."

"You accepted my biggest secret baby girl." Morgan hated seeing JJ look so alone, she needed to know how he felt "I didn't tell any of you because I thought you would blame me, push me away for what happened but you didn't, none of you did. You were there for me Jayje, that first night back, you knocked on my door and we just sat and watched movies for hours. Please baby I hate seeing you like this, I love you like a sister. We just want to help you." Morgan wiped the tear from his cheek before anyone but JJ noticed it was there.

"Morgan…I'm…I'm really sorry about this morning, I…" JJ didn't know how she could apologies because 'I'm sorry' just didn't seem enough.

"Forget about it Baby girl, I already have."

"Thankyou." JJ mouthed to him as the smile she gave still didn't reach her eyes.

JJ looked at them all. She could see the pleading in their eyes and the sadness. Last she locked eyes with Emily and Garcia and out of know where she found courage and strength from her best friends glances.

"I don't know where to begin." JJ said with a shake still in her voice.

"The beginning normally is a good place Kitten." If it was possible more colour drained from JJ's face at Garcia's nickname and her eyes closed tight with fear. You could hear the gasp come from Sophie and the small grown come from Peter, The team looked at each other wondering what was wrong with what Garcia had said.

"Please" JJ managed to push away the vomit feeling that rose inside her "Don't call me that."

"Jayje, I'm sorry, I didn't…" Garcia knew from The three adults reaction that the nickname she used was a bad choice of words.

"It's ok" JJ opened her eyes and could see the hurt in Garcia's "You'll understand soon, just please don't call me that anymore." JJ didn't sound angry or annoyed she sounded scared.

"Ok I won't." Emily's hand rested on top of Garcia's "How about Gumdrop is that ok?"

"All the others are good just not that one." JJ could see the hurt lift from her best friends eyes.

They sat in silence waiting for JJ to start. When she didn't Peter rested a hand on her shoulder "The beginning Shel, It's always the best."

"The beginning…ok" JJ took a deep breath preparing herself for what she was about to do….

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><p><strong>AN NEXT will be Wendesday or tomorrow night.**

**i am still getting alot of people reading it but not as many reviews as i would like so please review and make a girl extra happy!**

**AJ x**


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N i got home sooner than i thought i would so here is the next chapter. Smeone askede in a feview if Shelbys/JJ's mother nd Walt make another apperance and yes they do and its good!**

**SHE TELLS THEM WHO SHE REALLY IS! **

**AJ x**

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><p>"When I was 8 my mother married a man. His name is Walt" JJ visibly winced at the use of the monsters name "We seemed like the Perfect little family. It was me, Mum, Jess and him. They both used to drop me and Jess of at ballet and pick us up together. I remember our dance teacher talking to them saying how we all looked like a perfect little family. I was happy, we all were." She looked down at the coffee table remembering her childhood.<p>

"I had never really had a father figure so when he would come into my bedroom at night and watch me sleep or lay next to me calling me kitten," she could see some understanding in Garcia's eyes "telling me how much he loved me, I didn't think anything of it, I thought that's what all dads did. I really was the happiest little girl in the world" JJ stopped to steady her shaking hands; this is where it got hard.

"That was until my 10th birthday. We had a massive party with all of my friends. Balloons, clowns, bouncy castled you name it I had it there. It was an amazing day but it is still one of the worst of my life." JJ knew by the look on her team member's faces, Morgan's clenched fists and Garcia's and Emily's tears that she didn't have to keep explaining but if she was going to tell the whole story she had to.

"When it came time to go to bed, everything seemed normal. Mum tucked me in and I fell asleep." The first tear fell from JJ's face and Sophie walked over with a box of tissues, she handed one to JJ and put the rest on the coffee table "I woke up hours later with a hand over my mouth….Wa…W…" JJ gritted her teeth; she didn't want to be afraid of a name "Walt was on top of me. He whispered in my ear how pretty I was and how special I was. Th…then he r…ra…raped me. I was so scared and it hurt so much, all I could do was beg him to stop but he didn't."

Morgan, Hotch and Rossi looked angry, Reid looked sad and Emily and Garcia didn't even bother to hide the tears that were falling for their friend. JJ tried to compose her self and stop the tears. For a few moments it worked but over all it was no use. The story hurt too much to tell and to keep calm at the same time.

"After the first few times I got over the shock and started to fight him but he said if he didn't do it with me…He would go and find Jess."

"JJ, baby, I'm so sorry." Garcia sniffed. All she wanted to do was hold her best friend and let her cry in her arms.

"Please, I need to finish. You all deserve to know everything." JJ received a nod from Garcia "He said he would find Jess, so I kept quite. When he would come in, I just let him get on with it, do what he wanted to do, no matter how much it hurt or how disgusting it was. I had no choice, I had to protect her. When I was 13, I couldn't stand it anymore. So I ran away from home." Peter handed JJ the glass of water from his desk. She took it and said "Thankyou."

He took the glass from her hand and whispered in her "Your doing really well, your almost there." JJ nodded and continued.

"I ran away but mum found me and took me back. About a year later I ran again and mum found me. So I learnt from my mistakes, I saved more money and bided my time." JJ was about to reveal her dirtiest secret.

"Just after my 15th birthday, I don't know what happened but he changed. He got more vicious; he liked hurting me more, and leaving me with bigger bruises and cuts." JJ could feel her heart trying to beat its way out of her chest.

"After one of his brutal attacks I ran again, but this time I got further. For the first few weeks I did ok on the streets. I was sleeping under a bridge one night and I stumbled across Heroin and Barbiturates." JJ took a glance at Reid. She knew how much he had struggled with his drug addiction and at one point she had come so close to telling him but as she was about to tell he had fallen asleep and she promptly changed her mind.

"I became addicted to both and that's what I ended up spend most of my money on. After another week or so I had ran out, I didn't even have anything to buy food. So I started begging and routing threw dumpsters for something, anything but it wasn't enough. After a few days the lack of food and the withdrawal of the drugs started making me weaker and weaker."

'Here goes nothing' JJ said to herself.

"That was when I mat Patty. She showed me how to survive…" JJ looked down at the coffee table she could deal with them all knowing about Walt but knowing what she had done, JJ didn't think she could deal with that. She didn't want to see the disappointment and disguise in their eyes.

"I started turning tricks." She paused waiting for one to them to either walk out or tell her how much of a whore she was. When nothing happened JJ didn't look up from the table but continued.

"It was the only way I could get food and the fix I needed. Me and Patty we stuck together, we watched each others backs. Made sure the other was safe." JJ took another sip of water and wiped the flood of tears away "I had been doing it for about two months, when I got home from a trick…Patty was lying on the couch. She was dead. She had OD." JJ found the courage to look up at the team and all of them Hotch and Morgan included either had tears in their eyes or were crying.

"I grabbed as much of my stuff from the place we were staying and I walked out leaving her body to be buried as a 'Jane Doe'." JJ just wanted it all to be over now.

"No more than a week later this car pulled up in front of me and who should roll down the window but my biological father, the man I hadn't seen since I was a baby. As soon as I saw him, I kicked of my heals and legged it, but he caught me, he dragged me into the car kicking and screaming. I thought he was taking me back, that he was sanding me back to him but he didn't. We drove for hours and I found out that mum had called him asking for his help in finding me" She felt Peters hand on her shoulder and she looked up at him. JJ could see how proud of her he was. Her story was starting to get a little better.

"Anyway, eventually we stopped and out of the car I climbed to be faced with Peter. My Father had brought me here, to Horizon." JJ Smiled a smile that for the first time in days finally reached her eyes.

"I got clean and I spent the next 3 months in counseling sessions and group therapy with Peter and Sophie, while they chipped away at me trying to get me to open up to them."

"Which you did….eventually" Sophie gave JJ a light hearted smile although she knew her story was far from over.

"Yeah, I just spent the first 3 months being a complete bitch to everyone."

"Why?" For the first time since JJ began to talk Hotch thought it was the correct time to ask a question.

"Why?….because treating everyone badly pushed them all away. I was always scared that if someone got to close they would figure it all out and then Jess wouldn't be safe anymore. As well as the fact I didn't trust anyone and I thought I didn't deserve them all to care…" Hotch nodded in understanding.

"Keep going JJ." As JJ's best friend, Emily knew her well enough to know that she wasn't finished yet.

"I had been here for a while and I got a phone call from my mother saying that Walt" It now wasn't just JJ that shivered at the name but Emily and Garcia also did "Had a heart attack. I prayed so hard that he would die. That I would never have to be scared of him again but he didn't and mum said I had to go back to look after him while she worked and Jess was in school." Garcia raised her hand over her mouth as fresh tears fell and Morgan was looking mad again "So that's what happened. Mum pulled me out of one place I felt safe and took me back to my very own hell…." She didn't want to do it anymore; she didn't want to tell the rest "That's enough Peter, please no more."

"I can't make you do anything Shel, but you are doing so well. You're almost done." Before Peter could say anything else Emily rose from her seat and knelt down next to JJ and took the blonde's hands in her own.

"Keep going Jayje. Were still here aren't we?"

"When I got back he looked so weak and pathetic. It would have been so easy to kill him right then." She felt Emily's hand tighten round hers "But I didn't. I did everything for the man that abused me. I cooked for him and took care of him, but he still couldn't leave me alone. When ever I got close enough he would touch me and tell ne how much he missed out special little sessions." Taking a deep breath JJ continued "That was when I found out…he…erm…" JJ was shaking "He did it to Jess too." JJ put her head to her chest and low sobs left her mouth as Emily held her tight.

She took a shaky deep breath and continued "I should have never have believed him when he said he wouldn't touch her. It was my fault, if I hadn't have ran he would never have touched her. If I had stayed and let him have me, she wouldn't be dead today. I came so close to killing myself that night, I couldn't deal with the guilt I was feeling a guess. As I held the knife to my wrist I realized there was nothing from stopping me reporting what he had done to us, so I did, I called the police" JJ could feel Emily's hand tighten round hers again "They came and took him away. When Jess denied it the officers said that they would have to take us away as well but mum didn't want that. So that's when she came out and admitted…She knew what he was doing to us. My mother knew that monster left her bed every night and came into my room, into Jess's room and raped us and she didn't stop him. Our own mother." Emily grabbed a tissue for herself and JJ.

"I was sent back to Horizon till the court case. That was when I started to open up properly. I started really talking to Peter and Sophie. The court case came 6 months later and he was released on a technicality. The officer that arrested him didn't read him his rights." You could hear Hotch and Rossi give a loud sigh.

"I came back to Horizon for a few weeks after but I couldn't deal with everything. The guilt and anger, I could feel myself slipping back to my old ways, I couldn't be that person again. I knew Jess was in a safe place so I called my Father. I said I needed his help with something and he came and picked me up in the middle of the night. I thought it would be better for everyone if I just vanished." JJ looked up at Sophie "Someone once told me it was called spoiling. That every time I hade something good I would ruin it before I ever had a chance to get hurt." Sophie let out a little laugh and a nod of her head.

"Anyway my Father had a lot of money and contacts in high places for example Strauss." Hotch and Rossi rolled their eyes, 'they should have known' both men thought to them self's.

"He pulled some strings and got me into witness protection. That's where I met Agent Willis and well the rest you know. I became Jennifer Jareau and eventually joined the academy." JJ looked up and glanced at her family. They looked at her with the pity and sympathy that the Cliffhangers once did but there was something else in their eyes and JJ couldn't tell what it was, all she could do was guess and she jumped to the conclusion that it was the emotion she feared the most, disgust.

Emily went to reach for JJ's hand but JJ pulled away. She pushed the hurt away that she was feeling because she needed to focus on her best friend at the moment.

"Jayje its…" She went to reach for JJ again but she jumped out of her seat and ran to the door. Sophie beat her too it and wouldn't let JJ threw.

"Shelby, don't do this, please."

"Move Sophie." It wasn't JJ talking anymore it was Shelby. JJ let her take over because she couldn't deal with the rejection from her family and Shelby knew how to handle it.

"Shel…" Peter came up behind her "It's going to be ok." He put a hand on her shoulder but she swung round and almost hit him in the face.

"Don't touch me!" JJ screamed and turned back to Sophie "Move! Get out of my way!"

"No, I wont let you run away from something good again Shel." Sophie didn't move from the door. The others were all on their feet watching JJ loosing control. Hotch took a step towards JJ to try and calm her.

"JJ, you need to calm down, we can talk about what ever it is that has scared you. Please come and sit back down."

"Stay away from me!" Tears were streaming down her cheeks and she was shaking with fear and anger "Sophie, MOVE!"

"Shelby, please let us help you." Peter didn't touch her this time.

"NO! You can't help me, none of you can. I don't need your help I just need to get out of here." Blood started to run from JJ nose and was seen by the whole team and Peter and Sophie. JJ wiped her nose with the back of her hand a saw the blood, she looked back at the woman in front of the door "please."

"Sophie its ok, you can move." Morgan saw how desperate JJ was and the blood worried him even more "your just going to clear your head, aren't you JJ?" She didn't look at him but nodded. When the team had found out what happened to him as a child all he wanted to do was get away from then and clear his head.

When Sophie did eventually get out of the way, it didn't talk a second for the door to fly open and JJ to run out.

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><p><strong>AN i wrote this a few times to get it right and i think i got there in the end. Let me know if it was done right or not.**

**AJ x**


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N i got a really good responce from the lat chapter so thankyo everyone that read it and is still reading. i love you guys**

**AJ x**

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><p>"Oh my poor girl." Garcia collapsed back onto the couch and sobbed. Morgan sat next to her and held her close to his chest; the tears were freely falling from his eyes too.<p>

"How did we not see this?" Reid sat on the couch "we've been working with her for years and we never knew."

"We didn't see it because she didn't want us too." Hotch sighed, he was feeling slightly guilty for letting them gang up on her like they did just before she ran out "From what I gather JJ has spend almost all of her life keeping secrets so when she joined the BAU she wasn't going to change the habit of a life time."

"I thought we weren't supposed profile each other Aaron." Rossi gave his friend a look that only Hotch knew, it was telling him to stop.

"I think we've all been profiling her since Strauss spoke to her." Morgan wiped away his tears.

"I don't understand why she didn't tell me." Garcia untangled her self from Morgan's arms.

"She didn't want you to see her the way she saw herself" Peter interjected himself in the conversation from the other side of the room holding a sobbing Sophie in his arms "and she ran off because she saw something in you that she didn't like."

"What do you mean didn't like? Like what?" Garcia's voice raised two octaves.

"Think about it. She didn't want to tell you because she didn't want you too see her as weak, dirty and for lack of a better word….a whore." Peter sat on the chair that JJ was sat moments before "Shelby must have seen it in one of you and freaked out, She was always good at that."

"We would never see her like that." Emily looked shocked and hurt that her best friend would even think that "She's one of us, we love her and what happened to her was not her fault."

"But she didn't have to sleep with men for money." A quite voice broke in.

"Reid?" Morgan almost yelled.

"What? She turned to drugs out of choice and when she didn't have enough cash left she whore'd her self out to pay for them. Are you seriously telling me that's not her fault?"

"Reid I cant believe your saying this?" Garcia whispered barely able to keep from leaping at the man next to her.

"Do you have any idea what's it like to be abused by someone you trust?" Morgan was getting med at the youngest member of the team "to be forced to do something you don't want to do?"

"Yes as a matter a fact I do. Don't you remember Hankle?" Reid stood and came face to face with Morgan.

"Well you of all of us should understand why she turned to drugs. She wanted to forget she that bustard did to her and wanted to forget what she had to do as a result of that! I'm proud of her. She managed to turn her life round, yeah ok she went about it the wrong way but she did it. I'm proud of her because she told us what happened even though it was obviously hurting her and then you go and make it worse by saying she could have found some other way of doing things!" Garcia stood up and put her hands on Morgan's chest

"Honey pie, I think you need to calm down."

"No!" He didn't even look at Garcia. Reid's eyes were filling with tears "Do you think she wanted to become a prostitute, or a drug addict or homeless?"

"No but…" Reid's tears finally fell and he realized that Morgan was right.

"But nothing she did what she did to survive. To save herself and her sister from that monster!"

Reid didn't say anything more; he sat back down and cried silent tears.

"Pen have you got your laptop on you?" Emily sat on one of the free seats. Garcia pulled Morgan back down to the seat next to her and pulled out her laptop without a word.

"What are you looking for?" Rossi asked.

"I just want to have a look." Emily started tapping away at the computer. She stopped a few minutes later and read what the screen said "Its all here."

"What is?" Morgan asked this time.

"Everything. The abuse and rape allegations, The arrests reports for pros prostitution and drugs."

"I still have her file and medical reports if you want to read threw them." Peter walked over to his desk and pulled out a thick A4 folder and placed it on the coffee table.

"Medical reports?" Rossi looked slightly worried.

"Yeah when her father brought her here the first time, Shel was pretty banged up." He frowned looking down at the file on the table "C'mon Soph." Peter pulled his wife up from the couch by her hands "We're gonna go and see if we can find her." Hotch nodded as the others just stared at the file.

One the door closed No one said anything for a while. They were all going over the past hours events in their heads. They were all struggling to deal with what had happened to JJ as a child and to accept the face that they didn't really know her at all.

"Should we read it?" Garcia asked.

"No. I don't want to know what she was like as Shelby. I just want our old JJ back."

"Emily's right. Leave it. We need to make her understand that what she told us doesn't effect how we feel of think about her. She is still the same JJ we used to know, she just has a few more skeletons in her closet than the rest of us. It doesn't change the fact that we love her and we would all be a little lost without how." Rossi said and stood up taking the file and putting it back on Peter's desk.

"I didn't mean what I said. I was just struggling to put things together." Reid piped up wiping his face.

"Its ok kid" Morgan reached over Garcia and patted Reid on the back "We know you didn't mean it and neither did I. I just wanted somewhere to vent my anger and you were there."

"I know thanks" Reid gave him a small smile.

"Why was she bleeding, just before she ran out, she started bleeding." Garcia wondered looking at Hotch.

"I think it was from stress. The past few days have been immensely hard on her. And when we refused to let it out her body couldn't take the strain anymore and…well…It relieved some of the tension, is one way to put it."

"But surly that can't be a good thing?" Garcia looked scared.

"No" Reid was about to throw in some facts but something told him now wasn't the time "It's not good. If she keeps this up she could do some permanent damage."

"If I ever set my eyes on that bastard that did this to her again, I'm gonna kill him." Morgan clenched his fists as his eyes flashed with anger.

"Your gonna have to get in line." Rossi pushed himself of Peter's desk "Lets go and find our girl and let her know nothing has changed."

Emily and Garcia grabbed a handful of tissues each and followed the men out of the door in search for their lost friend.

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><p>Peter and Sophie walked out of the administration building hand in hand and over to the old Cliffhangers who were sat talking at the benches.<p>

"Hey guys, have you seen Shelby?" Peter asked.

"Yeah she ran out towards the wood house a few minutes ago." Scott pointed behind him "We called her but she just kept running."

"She's good at that." Daisy scowled.

"What happened? Is she ok?" Scott gave Daisy a dirty look.

"She told them." Sophie sighed.

There was a resounding 'O' from the old students.

"How well did they take it?" Juliette rubbed her belly.

"They were still processing it when we left."

"We had better go and make sure she's ok." Peter pulled Sophie with him before turning to Daisy "And dais, lay of her will you. She's having a hard time. She was there for you when you mother passed. We all know she did the wrong thing by running and she knows it too but you can't change the past, I think we all know that more than anyone. If you can't be there for her just keep the comments to yourself please."

They didn't wait for a comment or dark statement from Daisy they just kept walking to the wood house. When they got there they saw no sight of the broken blonde they were after.

"Peter, where is she?" Sophie was starting to get worried.

"Hey, don't worry. If she's going to run she won't before the funeral and hopefully by then we can persuade her to stay." Peter pulled her into a hug. He kissed the top of Sophie's head and saw out of the corner of his eye a small figure sitting at the end of the dock.

"I've found her Soph."

They both walked over to JJ. Her eyes were red and puffy, her skin was pail and she had a freshly lit cigarette in her mouth.

"Can we sit down" Sophie asked.

"Id rather you not." JJ blew the smoke out as she spoke.

"Well id rather we did." Peter and Sophie sat either side of JJ with their legs dangling just above the water.

That sat in silence waiting for JJ to say something. In that time she had lit another cigarette.

"Where'd you get them from Shel?" Peter asked grabbing the box that sat in between them and putting it in his shirt pocket.

"I made most of the hiding places round here Peter. They were in the first place I checked; there was a packet of condoms in there too." A Cold looking smile crossed her face "I think I'll keep them, you never know they could come in handy." Even when Shelby first arrived at Horizon she didn't seem this beyond repair. Peter looked over at Sophie and her face was filled with pure worry and fear. Shelby had always been like a daughter to them and when she ran it broke both their hearts.

"Talk to us Shel" Sophie put her hand on JJ's shoulder but it was pushed off. She didn't say anything in reply just took another drag of her cigarette.

"C'mon Shelby, we can't help you unless you talk to us." Peter pushed his fears away, he could break down later but now he needed to try and save the young woman.

"You couldn't help me even if I wanted you too. Did you know I had sex with the delivery guys here just to get a carton of fags?" She saw the looks of horror on their faces "See you couldn't even help me back then." JJ sniggered.

Both Peter and Sophie spent the next 10 minutes getting over the shock of what they were just told and practically begging the lost girl to talk. When they heard the old wood creak behind them, they stood and saw JJ's family. They thought that maybe they could help her.

Sophie walked over to them but Peter knelt down next to JJ and whispered in her ear "I know your in there somewhere. I'm not giving up on you Lost Girl." He stood and went to walk to the others

"Peter" JJ turned to look at him. He knelt down to her side again.

"Yeah?"

When he got close enough JJ reached into his shirt pocket and pulled out the cigarettes before he could stop her "Thanks" She stated in a dark cold voice, much like the girl that climbed out of her fathers car many years ago. He went to grab them out of her hands but with her fast reflexes she grabbed his wrist "Oh I wouldn't do that if I were you." And she gave his a stare that sent shivers down his spine. He stood up and walked over to the team a few meters up the dock.

"How is she?" Reid asked.

"Honestly?" Peter pulled Sophie into his arms, she looked like she was about to burst into tears "I hate to say it but…" He looked at the blonde still staring off over the lake now with a lit cigarette in her hand "I think she's finally snapped. That's not the girl I used to know and it's most defiantly not the woman you know."

"We've lost her haven't we?" Asked Sophie from Peter's arms.

"Yeah. I think we have." No more was said as Peter and Sophie walked off the dock and to the cabins.

The team looked at the couple walking away and then turned to stare at each other.

"We're not giving up on her." Hotch took the lead and joined JJ at the end of the dock. The others joined him. He took the side Peter was sitting and Emily took the other side, Morgan sat on his knees right behind JJ with Garcia and Reid either side of him while Rossi stayed standing at the back.

"Oh for crying out loud what is this some bloody kind of intervention? Cant a girl have a fag in peace round here." JJ finished the one in her hand and lit another one.

"My Mother used to call them coffin nails." Emily said with a smile remembering the lecture she got from her mother when she got caught smoking.

"Well Ambassador Prentiss dose know how to suck the life out of things." JJ took a deep puff.

"For every cigarette you smoke it takes 6 minutes off your life also…" Reid was about go into full blown statists when JJ pulled out another one.

"Really…well lets have another one shall I or better yet I could slit my wrists maybe this time I wall actually succeed."

Garcia gasped and put her hand over her mouth in shock. It hurt the others to hear their friend talk this way but the trained profilers knew that she was only using the shock factor to keep them all away. She didn't mean to hurt them or scare them but it was the only way she could deal with everything without getting herself hurt more in the process.

"JJ give the me cigarettes." Hotch held out his hand.

"No…" a laugh escaped her lips one they only ever heard from an Unsub "What you gonna do…sack me? Well guess what…I quit. You can find your self some other skivvy to do your dirty work." JJ pulled out her badge from her pocket and threw it on Hotch's lap. While she was doing this she left the packed of smoked resting on her leg and Emily grabbed them and passed them over her shoulder to Morgan "Give them back." JJ turned and Gave Emily a dirty look before turning to Morgan and going to grab them but she wasn't fast enough. Morgan threw them over her head and into the lake.

"Oh that's just pathetic, how old are you 5?" JJ rolled her eyes and finished the last one in her hand. Emily and Hotch were looking at JJ's face when a smirk crossed her lips. She turned to look at Morgan.

"Do you want to finish what we started this morning?" The tears were falling from Garcia again and Morgan just looked at her in shock "I guess not." She stood and climbed over him and Reid "Well I'm sure I can find someone round here that will."

JJ got half way up the dock when Hotch called out.

"Jennifer stop!" JJ stopped in her tracks. He had never called her by her first name before. She stopped but didn't turn round "Enough ok, please. Stop trying to push us away. You can make all the dark comments and hurtful remarks you want but were still going to be right there beside you because we love you."

They couldn't see it but she face was no longer cold and hard. It had softened.

"We love you because you're JJ and we wouldn't change you for the world. You're what holds this team together." Hotch didn't know what else to say to help so Emily tried.

"Jayje you're like a sister to me, both you and Pen. You both accepted me right from the beginning when I was new to all this, we've had brilliant nights out and evenings in eating buckets full of ice-cream and watching movies." JJ turned round with tears streaking down her face, they were finally getting threw to her, maybe she wasn't completely shattered after all "I know what it must have seemed like in there but we weren't angry or disgusted at you." Emily started taking steps towards JJ "We were mad and disgusted at the monster that did those things to you, that made you do those things." Emily reached JJ and took her face in her hands, she wiped the tears away with her thumbs as the others gathered round JJ as well "You did what you had to survive Jayje and for that we are so proud of you. You went threw worse things than most people could images and you have come out the other side."

Morgan wrapped his arms round her waist "You don't have to run from us baby girl, were right here for you, were not leaving you none of us. If you need some one to talk to, scream at or you just need someone to hold you all you have to is come and find one of us."

Garcia took JJ's hand "Were all here and were all going to protect you gumdrop and that is a promise we can all keep."

JJ looked round at each member of their family and there wasn't the anger of hate in their eyes that was there back in Peter's office. There was love and concern and in that moment JJ finally believed that they weren't going to abandon her for anything and it made her feel awful for the way she had just treated all of them.

"I'm sorry, I'm so so sorry." JJ let the dam break and the floods poured. Morgan held tightly round her waist and Emily wrapped her arms round JJ shoulders.

"Shhhh sweetheart you have nothing to be sorry for. You were hurting and that's ok. Everything's going to be ok now. Your safe now, we've got you."

After a few minutes of sobbing, JJ's tears subsided and Morgan unwrapped his arms from JJ only to wrap them round Garcia.

"JJ you need to get some sleep. It's been a long day and I bet you didn't get much last night either." Hotch rubbed JJ's arms was she nodded her head which was resting on Emily's shoulder "Here, this belongs to you." Hotch handed JJ her badge.

"Thankyou." She whispered.

They all walked up to their cabin.

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><p><strong>AN I know this is really long but if i split it up this chapter would be really small nd i didnt want that so i gave you an extra long one. i love the bit where JJ is all cold and pushing everyone away. Please let me know what you think and it was god or not. **

**AJ x**


	13. Chapter 13

**AJ x**

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><p>The team had been back in the cabin for 30 minutes. As soon as JJ's head hit the pillow she was out like a light, the tiredness was finally catching up to her.<p>

"I still don't understand how we could get everything so wrong." Garcia had given up tapping away on her laptop and was sat on Emily's bed watching JJ sleep.

"She's good, well give her that." Emily sat up and joined Garcia. The men were listening into their convocation "When the cases involving child abuse or prostitutes came, we all just put her change in moods down to it being a hard case."

"None of us saw it because she didn't want us too and deep down we didn't want to see it either." Hotch put down the book he was reading.

"When we were sitting with her out by the dock, she scared me. She was so cold and distant. Nothing like our JJ. I honestly thought we would never get her back." Emily put her arms round Garcia as she let a few tears fall.

"We haven't got her back yet." Reid said from the other side of the room causing Morgan to throw a pillow at him and Hotch and Rossi to throw him glares "What! I'm not saying we wont, I'm just saying we still have a way to go yet." Reid sat back and got on with reading him book.

"The funeral is in a few days; maybe we should do something tomorrow so get her mind of things." Morgan suggested.

"Something fun so she can make some new good memories with us. She still needs reassuring that were not going to abandon her like everyone else." Garcia sat up.

"That's a good Idea we can ask her later what she would like to do." Hotch gave them all one of his rare smiles.

It wasn't long before nightmares started to fill JJ's dreams.

She was in her bedroom, the one she had as a child and he was there on top of her. She could feel his weight on her body, his hands on her hips and his breath in her neck. She could hear his whispers in her ear 'Oh my kitten, you're so beautiful. So tight my sweet, sweet Kitten.'. But the worst of all she could feel him inside her. Pain shot up threw her body, she was begging him to stop to leave her alone but he wouldn't he just kept going. She turned to look away from the monster and what she saw scared her just as much as the man on top of her. They were all there Hotch, Rossi, Morgan, Emily, Reid and Garcia. They were standing there in the door way just watching with disgusted looks on their faces. She begged them for help but they didn't come, they didn't stop him. With one last beg they just walked away. They turned their backs on her.

"No…" A whimper came from JJ and broke the quite whispers that were being spoken between the group "please…" Hotch, Emily and Garcia moved closer to JJ while the other men moved to the bed opposite JJ's so not to crowed her "Walt, don't"

"Shhh JJ its ok." Hotch rested his hand on her upper arm.

"Please, one night just leave me for one night me, please." Tears were falling down JJ temples and she was lying flat on her back with her arms pined above her head.

"Jayje, your safe sweetheart, wake up for us." Emily whispered.

"NO! Please your hurting me stop!" JJ started thrashing round but still seemingly pined down.

"JJ wake you, he's not here. You're with the team." Hotch gently shook JJ.

"NO! Hotch, Em, Morgan Don't leave me, please come back." A small trickle of blood ran from JJ's nose down the side of her face. The team looked up at each other with dread "Pen, Reid, Rossi please don't leave me with him. Please Walt get off me."

JJ's eyes burst open and she shot up from the bed causing Emily and Garcia to jump out of the way. She stood in the middle of the room looking round like she didn't know where she was. Then recognition filled her eyes and she remembered everything that had happened.

She brought her hand up to her mouth and covered the sob that escaped. She remembered the dream she had. Emily was the first to pull her self together and slowly walked over to JJ with her hands up in surrender to show the frightened woman she wasn't going to do anything.

"You ok JJ. Were here."

"You left me." JJ removed her hands and whispered.

"Were still here sweetheart. We didn't go anywhere." Emily frowned.

"No, in my dream." JJ's whole body was shaking with fear.

"Tell us about your dream JJ." Rossi stood but didn't make his was forward.

"Wa…W…He was there…o…on top of me. He wouldn't get of. I begged him but he wouldn't, he kept telling me how good it felt and kept calling me his kitten."

"Then what baby girl." Morgan moved and Joined Emily a few steps away from JJ. She looked so tired and broken, like a single gust of wind would blow her over. So he moved closer to catch her if she collapsed.

"Th…then you were there, all of you, you were watching. Then you left, you left me there…with him." JJ took a few deep breaths to try and calm her shaking.

"Oh Baby." It was hurting Morgan to see her like this.

"Come here JJ." Emily moved the final few steps and pulled JJ into a hug "We would never ever do that to you, do hear me? If he ever comes close to you again, I will kill him with my bare hands."

"We all will." Morgan rubbed her back.

They all came a bit closer to JJ, they didn't want to over crowed the fragile woman but they wanted her to know that they were there for good.

"I can still feel him on me sometimes, still smell him." JJ pulled back from Emily and looked at the all "For years, I longed for someone to know my secret, in the hope that they'd stop the pain and stop me from hurting." She felt Garcia's comforting arm wrap round her waist "I don't know how to handle things, Its all spiraling out of control."

"Were going to help you JJ, were going to be right here threw it all." Reid gave her a comforting smile over Emily's shoulder and that's when JJ noticed blood on her shirt.

"Emily, there's blood on you." JJ looked at her concerned.

"It's yours Jayje." Emily also gave her a sad smile.

"Oh" JJ put her hand to her nose and pulled it away noticing that it was in fact her blood. She remembered something and turned a ghostly white.

"What is it JJ?" Hotch asked noticing her colour change.

"Erm…When I left here and went into witness protection. I struggled with the fact what I was leaving Jess and Horizon behind and then starting at University, well it was a lot of stress and my body couldn't cope with it I guess." JJ looked down at the small spot of blood on her fingers "I started to get nose bleeds and I eventually collapsed in the middle of one of my classes. I was in hospital for a few days. The doctors said all the stress was causing my blood pressure to rocket and if I didn't get under control I could have a stroke."

Rossi and Morgan ran their hands over their faces, while Hotch ran his threw his hair. This was starting to get life threatening.

"And you're only telling us this now!" Rossi stated, his voice filled with concern.

"Sorry I guess it slipped my mind. It had been a long few days after all." Rossi rolled his eyes as JJ glared at him.

"Its ok, were just…going to have to watch you." Hotch sighed. Something else he had to worry about.

"Great, now you all have an excuse to stare at me." JJ said coldly but regretted it quickly "Sorry, I didn't mean it to sound like that I just…" Hotch gave her a smile and shook his head "I'm gonna go for a shower." JJ moved round Emily and grabbed her things.

"But that's the third one you've had today" Reid was curious as to why she started showering so much. JJ stopped with her back still to them.

"Reid leave it." Morgan but his hand on the youngest team members shoulder. JJ heard him and continued walking into the shower room.

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><p>An hour passed and JJ still hadn't returned from the shower and they were all glancing at the door every few minutes worried about what she was doing in there and if she was ok.<p>

"I'm going to check on her." Emily said abruptly standing from the bed.

The others didn't say anything or try and stop her because they were about to do the same thing.

Emily gently knocked on the door and waited for a reply. When she didn't get one she opened the door, went in and closed it behind her. The room was still filled with a large amount of steam and as soon as she opened the door the heat hit her like a smack in the face.

It took a second for Emily go get used to the heat and when she did she noticed JJ was standing at one of the sinks with her white town wrapped tightly at her chest staring into one of the mirrors with her arms wrapped round her middle for safety. As Emily got closer she could see that JJ's eyes were still red from where she had been crying again. Her skin was also bright red and blotchy in places but what worried Emily more was the face that JJ had new blood spots on her chest and arms.

"Oh Jayje." The pity pored from her voice and made JJ shudder. Emily reached out to touch JJ but as soon as she made contact she flinched away "Hey, its just me, I'm not going to hurt you." Emily didn't let the hurt be heard in her voice although JJ didn't need to hear it, she could tell it was there anyway. She felt she owed Emily an explanation.

"How can I expect you to touch me when I can't even touch my own skin? That's why I have showered so much over the past few days. I hate being dirty, I would give anything to be clean again, to be whole." JJ looked at Emily and pointed to the marks on her chest "I haven't done this since I left here Em."

"Wait here for a second." Emily rubbed JJ's arm and there was a small flicker of hope when JJ didn't flinch away. Emily walked over to the closed door and stepped out.

5 sets of eyes shot up and looked at her.

"Don't worry she's…ok. Erm…have any of you got any antiseptic cream with you"

Hotch ruffled threw his Go bag.

"Why?" Garcia asked. Fear struck her not for the first time that day.

"She's been scrubbing her skin raw again, by the time we leave she wont have any left is she keeps this up."

"Why dose she do it?" Reid looked curious. He had wanted to ask JJ last time they spotted it but he didn't feel comfortable.

"Because she wants to feel clean." Morgan looked down at his hands remembering the number of times he had done it as a teenager.

"But surly talking the shower would do that. She wouldn't have to scrub her skin till she bled."

'Reid is so naive sometimes' Hotch thought to himself as he found the cream and handed it to Emily.

"Wrong kind of clean kid." It was with that small statement from Morgan that Reid knew what he meant now and Morgan received sad looks from everyone as they all remembered what they knew about his past.

"Thankyou." Emily gave Hotch a smile and returned to JJ in the Shower room.

JJ was no longer stood by the sink; she was stat up against the wall opposite the door. Emily joined her on the floor and healed out the cream.

"Would you like me to do it?" She asked when JJ didn't take it. She just nodded and Emily set to work.

As she put the first dot of cream on some of the spots she noticed a distant look in JJ's eye.

"We were all thinking we could do something tomorrow. Something fun, to get your mind of things." Emily was trying desperately hard to get the old JJ back "What do you think?"

"I think that would be good." JJ answered after a minute with a twitch of a smile.

Emily went back out to the others when she had finished applying the cream to let JJ get changed.

"Thanks again Hotch." Emily went to hand him the cream back.

"Keep it you might need it again." He gave her a sad smile and she gave him one in return placing the cream in her go bag.

"I asked JJ if she wanted to do something tomorrow and she agreed." Emily said and saw Garcia and Morgan sit up with a smile.

"Really?" Garcia asked and was answered by Emily's nod.

JJ walked out the shower room and without warning was wrapped up in Morgan's tight and comforting hold.

"Baby girl" He whispered in her ear so only she could hear "If you ever need to talk, day or night you know where I am. I might not know about everything your going threw but I have an idea about some of it." He looked at her face and her eyes filled with tears. It meant a lot to her that Morgan would say something like that as he had never mentioned what had happened to him as a teenager since he was arrested.

"Thankyou." She whispered back and placed a soft kiss on his cheek causing him to blush a little. He pulled away but kept one arm wrapped round her shoulder.

"So what is there to do round this place?" he asked with a glint in his eye.

"This place is practically a summer camp. If it wasn't for all the delinquent teenagers and screw ups, it properly would be." They all chuckled as a small spark appeared in JJ's still dull blue eyes "Don't worry, I have a few ideas." Hotch and Rossi worried slightly when they caught the mischievous look on her face "It'll be an early one though."

All the men visibly groaned but Emily and Garcia didn't care if they had to get up early. They were just happy they still had their best friend.

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><p>AN the next chapter is...well its not light but it is a lot lighter than the last fewwA/N the next chapter is...well its not light but it is a lot lighter than the last fewould still love to know what all you amazing people think

**AJ x**


	14. Chapter 14

**AJ x**

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><p>The early morning sun shone over the grounds of Horizon as the BAU team finished loading the things into the two packs they were taking.<p>

"Ok. Are you all set? Got the maps and compasses?" Peter asked JJ as he handed her one of the packs.

"Yep, check, I think were all good." JJ smiled at the team stood behind her. Morgan, Emily, Hotch and Rossi were in the full hiking gear. Reid had on the hiking boots but still wore his normal cloths and Garcia…Well she did start the morning by wearing the full 'get up' but complained that it wasn't fare that JJ and Emily could look sexy in their hiking cloths but she looked like 'a cross between Eeyore on a wet day and Gumbo The Clown '. Then she almost slapped Morgan when he said that he thought she looked stunning, But was stopped by Rossi, much to Emily and JJ's disappointment. So by the time she got outside she was wearing hiking boots, dark blue jeans at JJ suggestion and a brightly coloured flowery top.

"Got the keys?" Peter asked with a raised eye brow. JJ rolled her eyes and pulled the keys out of her pocket and dangled them in front of his face "ok just checking."

"What are the keys for baby girl?" Morgan pulled the other bag onto his back.

"You'll see." JJ grinned at Peter.

"Here Shel." Sophie handed JJ a radio.

"Oh Thankyou, I'll keep it on me. Were not going too far, so we shouldn't need it."

"But better to be safe than sorry." Peter smiled…his heart warmed when he saw JJ smile. She still looked exhausted and her eyes were sunken still but he knew the BAU team weren't going to let anything happen to her.

"We had better get started; I want to be at the top before lunch. Then we should still have time to do the other thing on the way back down." JJ pulled Peter and Sophie into a hug and took a deep breath feeling their heat flow threw her body "I forgot how warm you two were." She whispered so only they could hear.

Both the older adults lent in and kissed JJ on the forehead.

"We'll see you tonight and I'll keep the radio on me all day incase you need me." Peter and Sophie waved them off as they walked into the woods.

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><p>They had been walking and laughing for about an hour when something struck Garcia.<p>

"Cupcake where in this beautiful place are we going?"

"I was wondering how long it would take you to ask and frankly for a bunch of profilers, I'm ashamed." JJ rolled her eyes and laughed.

"OI!" Emily gave JJ a nudge.

"Were going to Hangers Peak."

"That sounds….High." a worried look crossed Garcia's face.

"It's not that high. I had to propel down the face of it in my second year." Reid and Garcia just looked at her like she had slapped them in the face and Emily, Hotch, Rossi and Morgan gave her a proud smile. She took a quick look at the map in Emily's hands "If we keep going the way we are, we should be there in a few hours."

"Ok." Garcia pointed in front of her "This way my crime fighting super heroes."

They walked for another hour when Hotch noticed JJ was fidgeting with the pack she had strapped to her back.

"Here let me take that for you." He stopped her and put his hand out to receive the bag.

"No, I'm ok, I've got it." She said with a smile.

"JJ, your exhausted enough as it is and this is only making it worse. Give me the pack to carry." He gave her his boss man glare.

"Ok" JJ smiled at him as she removed the bag and handed it to him "Thankyou."

"Anytime." Hotch swung the bag on. The past few days had been hell on JJ's and her emotions. He came close to believing that had lost her at one point but he swore to himself that he wasn't going to let that happen.

"So c'mon JJ spill. What are we doing on the way down?" Emily nudged JJ at the front of the group.

"I'm not telling you, you're all just going to have to wait and see." She smirked at the woman walking next to her. Emily was about to say something when sound came over the radio attached to JJ's hip.

" contacting Shelby. Come in Shelby." JJ let out a sigh as she heard Scotts voice. She stopped, pulled up the radio and turned to the group who had stopped with her.

"This is J…" She paused she hated using her birth name "This is Shelby. What's wrong Scott? Over." JJ released the button.

"Nothings wrong. I just wanted to make sure you're all ok. It's been a while since you've been hiking Shel. Over" The radio crackled.

"Were fine Scott. We do work for the FBI after all, it's not like were un-fit. Over." You could hear the sarcasm pour from JJ's words.

"Right, yeah sorry. I'll let you get back to it then. Have fun. I'll see you when you get back. Over" JJ didn't respond. She put the radio back on her hip and kept walking as the others followed.

They walked in silence now; it wasn't a comfortable silence like it had been before Scott had radioed in. It was now un-comfortable and it was frustrating JJ.

They had come across a set of fallen trees when JJ stopped.

"Ok! Sit!" She pointed to the trees.

"Are you ok JJ?" Hotch asked with a wrinkled forehead.

JJ stayed standing while the others sat on the logs and looked at her.

"I know there are questions you want to ask me. So go ahead, ask…" She sighed but what she didn't realize was that although the team did have some questions they had made a mutual agreement to not talk to her about her childhood, teenage years or the past few days while they were on their little outing.

"Guys…" When she realized that none of them were going to ask anything she explained why she wanted to do this now "there are questions you want to ask so don't say there aren't. I want to get this out the way with now because we go home in a few days and when I set foot back in Quantico I just want to forget this whole nightmare ever happened." Hotch took a deep breath to say something but JJ stopped him "Hotch, I know I can't keep running from this, I made that mistake and it killed my baby sister." JJ's eyes filled with tears "I just want to go home and get my old life back. So please, if you have any questions ask them now or don't ask them at all" you could see on their faces with the exception of Hotch and Rossi that they were all debating it.

"Are you sure you want to do this JJ?" Spencer asked, he still wasn't sure.

"I'm sure Spence." She gave him a small smile.

"Ok…" He looked at Hotch and when he didn't receive one of his death glares he went on "When you blew up at Scott in the dining hall the other day, you said he asked you a question when you were at Horizon." She nodded.

JJ knew this question would be in there somewhere and mentally prepared herself for it.

"He asked you how many. How many what?"

JJ sat on the log next to Emily and thought for a second how she was going to answer that.

"Scott and I were in a relationship at the time…"

"I thought that kind of this was band round here." Hotch stated.

"It was and so where a lot of things I did here." Hotch raised an eye brow, he never knew she had suck a rebellious streak but then he didn't really know her at all "we were on our solos and erm…"

"What's a solo?" Garcia asked from next to Morgan.

"You spend 3 days out here on your own. You have the things in you pack, a map, a tent, a note book with some…lets just say questions and one childhood thing sent from home. Mum sent a pair of my ballet shoes." JJ shook her head to clear the memory and get back to Spencer's question "Anyway, before we left, I and Scott had a fight about…" She looked at each member of the team before looking at the ground "what I did on the streets and a few hours into the solo he came and found me. He wanted to talk, but we ended up fighting again and he asked me how many. He wanted to know how many tricks I had sex with." She found the courage from somewhere to look up and saw Hotch and Rossi had their normal blank expressions, Morgan looked angry and Emily, Garcia and Reid just looked shocked "And before you ask, I don't know. At the time all I was concentrating on was getting my next fix and getting to my bed alive that night."

"We weren't going to ask Jayje." Emily rested her hand on JJ's knee; she smiled up at the brunette.

"He…He…He asked you how many. I'll kill him" Morgan spat.

"Derek its ok. We sorted it out. I explained to him why I had to do what I did and I think he understood because it was never a problem again." Morgan clamed down a little.

"Peter said you were banged up when your dad brought you here. What happened?" Emily asked.

"Erm…a trick got a bit heavy handed. It wasn't the first time I'd gotten beaten up but it was one of the worse" JJ sighed.

"What were your injuries?" Hotch inquired.

"I had a couple of fractured ribs, Scratches all over and a lot of bruising that's all." Hotch nodded in understanding.

"You said you broke a lot of rules when you were here?" you could see a glint in Garcia's eye as her mind churned. JJ nodded "So my girl was a rebel…What kinds of things did you get up to. We want details!" Garcia beamed.

"Pen you definitely don't want details." Garcia looked at JJ slightly confused and so did Reid "ok…erm…I broke most of the rules going. I smoked, snuck out after lights out, swore, got into fights sometimes, I searched the woods for magic mushrooms the list goes on." JJ gave them a smile thinking they were going to stop there but it didn't.

"How did you manage to get the cigarettes?" Reid asked.

"Erm…" The colour drained from JJ's face and a flash of panic filled her eyes but it quickly vanished "What you have to understand is back then I was a complete mess. I had no respect for myself at all…"

"What did you do Jayje?" Emily put a reassuring hand on JJ's leg.

"I…" she took a deep breath "I had sex with the delivery guys in exchange for them. It was the only way I knew how to get the things I needed, and to me then it was just sex, because of everything I had been threw it never meant anything to me…" She started panicking and babbling.

"Hey, JJ its ok." Emily hugged the blonde "We understand why you did it, why you did everything; you don't have to explain yourself to us, ok?" JJ nodded.

The team looked at JJ and then each other; it was like they were reading each others minds. They could see that the questions were taking its toll on JJ and there wasn't any important questions left to ask.

"I think were good JJ." Hotch stood up and walked over to JJ and pulled her from the log.

"Good." A relieved smile crossed her face.

"Let's get to the top of this thing." Morgan walked over to JJ and put his are round her shoulder.

They all walked together. There was no more uncomfortable silence; there was no silence at all. The peacefulness of the woods was filled with the chatter and laughter of the BAU as they continued up Hangers Peak

**45 minutes later**

"WOW!" was all that came from the stunned BAU members as they looked at the view from the top of Hangers Peak. It wasn't the tallest mountain to climb but the view was still amazing. You could see the school and all the buildings in the distance. The lake was reflecting the trees surrounding it and the sky was bright blue.

"I forgot how amazing this place looked." JJ smiled

"This is stunning." Garcia pulled out her camera and took a picture of the landscape "Ok, now I want a group one."

"How are you going to do that baby girl?" Morgan chuckled. There was know one round to take a picture of the group.

"Oh…erm…" Garcia looked round "AHH…my chocolate god, ye of little faith." She walked over to a rock and put the camera down "Like that. Now everyone get in place." They all scattered round a little till they could all fit in the picture "Perfect. Ok know one move. Ready." She hit the button and ran to get in the picture "say cheese!"

"CHEESE!" The camera flashed.

Garcia ran over to it and looked at the picture "It's perfect!"

The others went over to take a look and it really was a good picture. It had them all smiling with the view in the background. It was one that was going on her wall when she got home.

"Great! Can we eat now, I'm starving!" Emily picked up the bag with the food in.

"You're always starving!" Morgan chuckled "OUCH!" he then rubbed the spot on his leg when Emily kicked him.

They all sat down on top of Hangers Peak and ate their lunch all silently dreading the day to come.

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><p><strong>AN sorry i dont know what is wrong with the A/N on the last chapter. anyway the next chapter is much more lighter than any other chapter. i think it's the lightst of them all. anyway please let m know what you think. i am struggling to finsh the last chapter.**

**AJ x**


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N Im not getting reviews anymore so m not sre if people still lik this fic.**

**AJ x**

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><p>Hours later they had reached the bottom of Hangers Peak and it looked like they were heading back to the school.<p>

"Baby Girl I thought we were doing something else?" Morgan asked.

"We are it's just threw here." JJ walked threw some trees into a clearing.

"Yes" Emily and Morgan shouted and high-fived as the rock wall came into view.

"Catch." JJ pulled the keys from her pocket and threw then at Morgan. He caught them and they all walked over to the small shed that held all the equipment.

20 minutes later they were all geared up and ready to go.

"Are you sure you don't want to play baby girl." Morgan asked Garcia who was sitting on the grass with her legs crossed in front of her.

"No, I'm shattered from that walk. You go and have fun…" She ruffled round in one on the packs then pulled out what she was looking for "I'll take pictures!"

"Ok" Morgan kissed the top of her head and went to join the others at the wall. Emily, Rossi, Hotch, JJ and a very reluctant looking Reid were already attached to the wall when Morgan got there.

"C'mon slow coach." Emily teased "Lets see if your any better than the last time we did this" It wasn't new to the team that Emily and Morgan liked to work out together, they often came in to work teasing each other.

"Well I'm better than you." Morgan poked his tongue out at her.

"Let's see if you two can beat me" JJ winked at the pair to her left.

"Hang on, how come when we asked if you wanted to come with us you said you didn't know how and didn't want to?" Morgan questioned.

"Because then you would ask where I learnt what I know." JJ answered with a small smile but quickly shook of the sadness, today was about fun and other than the 30 minutes they talked on the way up Hangers Peak, she was having a great time "Ok. Everyone ready?"

She received a 'yes' from Emily, Morgan, Hotch and Rossi but only a small grown from Reid who was at her right "Ok. GO!" She yelled.

Reid was still on the first few steps, Rossi and Hotch were about a quarter of the way up and Emily and Morgan were only in the middle when JJ reached the top and sat on the ledge looking down.

"C'mon guys! What am I too fast for you?" She teased and looked to the ground at Garcia who was cheering her on.

"Ok. So you're good." It was more of a statement than a question when it was yelled up by Morgan "but that's an un-fair advantage. You've done this wall before"

"Don't be a sore looser now Morgan" Rossi yelled from the other side of the wall.

"Next time we go climbing JJ, your coming with us no arguments!" Morgan looked down and glared at Rossi who was not too far behind them.

"How you doing down there Spence?" JJ yelled to the bottom ignoring Morgan.

"O…k" He shouted back up. He was getting there; he was now about a third of the way up.

Morgan and Emily reached the ledge at the same time, followed by Hotch and then Rossi.

"Not bad, for a couple of old guys." Morgan winked at Hotch and Rossi as JJ attached them to the Safety guard so they wouldn't fall.

They all looked over the wall and encouraged Spencer who was doing really well.

That was until he slipped and fell. He started panicking and couldn't get his foot hold.

"Spence! Take a deep breath and grab on to the wall." JJ yelled down but it didn't work he just continued panicking and the harness flipped him upside down "DAMNIT!" JJ cursed.

The other four at the top of the wall watched JJ slightly panicked as she attached herself back onto her line and repelled down the wall.

She reached Reid with only one push of the wall. She grabbed his shirt to pull him up right.

"Hold onto my waist." She told him and he did, tight "Ok Spence I still need to breath." She joked.

"Sorry" was all he could squeak. JJ attached him to her harness and yelled up to Morgan "Release his line. I'm gonna take him down."

Seconds later Reid was only hanging on by his harness to JJ's and they were slowly going town to solid ground.

They hit the bottom and JJ unhooked him as Garcia ran over.

"You ok Spence?" She asked the very pale looking man.

".GOD Genius! Are you ok?" Garcia squeaked.

"Yeah. I'm fine just a little shaken" He reassured them "and erm…" He went bright red "I'm erm…"

"A little squashed?" Reid just nodded looking at the floor "That shouldn't last long." JJ couldn't help but snigger "Pen take him to sit down, I've got go back up and help the others down." Garcia helped a shaking Reid over to the bags on the grass. JJ chuckled to her self a bit more and started to climb the wall again.

"Is he ok?" Hotch asked when JJ reached the top.

"Yeah, I think his prides a bit damaged not to mention his erm…family jewels." She gave them a wink and they all burst out laughing.

They spent the next hour just hanging out and climbing up and down the wall.

"Guys we've got an hour till sunset. We need to get back." JJ started packing away all the equipment with the help of the others.

"How far back is it Gumdrop?" Garcia got of the ground and picked up the bags handing them to Morgan and Hotch.

"Only about 20 minutes. It's not far."

They slowly made their way back to camp. It felt good to get away from everyone and everything for the day but as they got closer and closer to the school JJ started to get quieter and quieter and the colour that had sparked in her eyes threw the day slowly started to vanish again. She had a sinking feeling in the bottom of her stomach.

"There you are!" Peter exclaimed as they walked out the tree line.

"You all look shattered." Sophie giggled "Here I made you a stack of sandwiches I didn't think you would want to do more than shower and go to bed." She handed Emily a large brown bag.

"Thankyou and no your right, I need to sleep."

"Wow Emily Prentiss not thinking about food. There's a first for everything." Morgan chuckled.

"It'll be a first for my foot in your face if you don't shut it." She gave him a sweet smile.

"Shelby, you ok?" Peter asked seeing how distant she looked.

"Oh…yeah, I'm gonna take a shower than go to bed." She walked off to the cabin and the others followed except Hotch who stayed next to Peter and Sophie.

"Is she ok?" Sophie asked concerned.

"I don't know, we were having a good day but as we got closer she started to get quieter. I expect she's just nervous about the funeral tomorrow."

"Yeah most likely." Peter smiled at him.

"Speaking of which, how are the arrangements for tomorrow?" Hotch asked.

"Everything's arranged. Jess arrived yesterday at the mortuary and everything is meant to be here in the morning."

"Ok well, I'm going to get some rest, its going to be a long day." Hotch shook Peters hand and bid them goodnight.

JJ sat her jumper on the bed and took off her boots when Emily came and sat next to her making her jump.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you. Are you ok?" She asked slightly concerned.

"I'm fine." JJ brushed her off and grabbed her shower things and fresh cloths. She was walking into the shower room when Emily grabbed her arm.

"JJ what's going on?"

"I…I don't know. Something doesn't feel right." JJ looked worried.

"I'm sure its just nerves." She pulled JJ into a hug "Don't worry everything's going to be ok, just you watch."

"Yeah." JJ turned and went to shower.

The rest of the night was filled with Garcia showing then the pictures she took and then them all falling asleep.

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><p>JJ woke the next morning with a fright. She had had another nightmare but this time it was a quite one as know one else was awake. She looked over at the clock, it said it was only 5:30 she sighed and sat up. JJ was too nervous to try and go back to sleep so she lay there watching the sun rise out of the window and listening to the sounds of her sleeping colleagues.<p>

The hours ticked by and 7:30 quickly came along with her waking family. Emily sat up and saw that JJ way lying awake looking up at the ceiling. She got Garcia's attention and tipped her head in JJ's direction. As if they were reading each others minds Emily and Garcia got up and walked over to JJ's bed. Emily laid on JJ's left with her arms round the blonde's waist and Garcia laid on JJ's right with her hand in hers. The two women stayed like that for a while just letting JJ feel the comfort of their bodies and support. Her eyes slowly started to drift closed as her best friends warmth spared threw her body and sleep over came the exhausted woman.

"Em, Princess…" Morgan walked onto their view so they didn't move and wake JJ "Were gonna go to the kitchen, get breakfast and bring it back here for everyone, Ok?" Emily smiled at him in agreement.

"Are you two going to be ok with her on your own for a bit?" Rossi asked.

"Yeah go on and don't forget the coffee. Lots of it were all going to need it today especially our cupcake." Garcia said to them men.

"Ok…" Morgan walked out of the room after the other men.

30 minutes Garcia and Emily were still lying on the bed, they hadn't spoken a word since the men left the room. They were happy that JJ seemed to be getting some rest and both of them quietly promised that they would do whatever they had to do to get their best friend back even if it meant moving into her home with her.

A low whimper came from the sleeping blonde.

"Shhhhhh" Emily whispered in JJ's ear.

"Please don't…." JJ whimpered some more.

"You're ok Jayje." Garcia gently rubbed her arm.

"No, don't do this again please Walt." JJ said a little louder.

"We need to wake her up before it gets a hold on her." Emily sat up and gently shook JJ's shoulders which seemed to do the trick as she slowly started to open her eyes.

"Hey, Angelfish, your ok." Garcia continued to rub soothing circled on JJ's arms.

"I'm sorry." JJ whispered still lying on the bed.

"Don't apologies, you have nothing to be sorry for." Emily gave her a warm smile.

"Thankyou for lying with me, both of you." She looked at Emily and Garcia.

"Anytime Jayje."

"We mean it butterfly, any time you need us, day or night all you have to do is call and we'll both come running as fast as humanly possible." Garcia rested her head next to JJ's and Emily nodded in agreement at they Garcia had said.

"Talk to us Jayje"

JJ's eyes shifted away from Emily and Garcia's, she was trying to avoid talking to them.

"Hey," Emily gently tilted JJ's face towards her "Don't do this, not now Jayje. You've come so far, don't push us away now." JJ sighed, she knew what she was feeling was stupid but she couldn't shake it.

"I don't know…Something's not right. I've got a bad feeling about today"

"Maybe it's just because of what's happening today, its not going to be easy." Emily turned round and sat next to them leaning against the head board.

"Yean, maybe." JJ sighed just as Hotch, Rossi, Morgan, Reid, Peter and Sophie walked in their arms filled with either trays of food or coffee.

"Oh boys, you are my god given solace. Hand me the caffeine." Garcia reached out a hand and Morgan slipped a cup in, as well as handing one to Emily and JJ.

"How's it going Princess?" Morgan asked JJ as he sat on the end of the bed drinking his warm coffee.

"I'm fine Morgan." She gave him a smile.

"Shelby!" Peter gave her a knowing look.

"What!" She replied.

"You know how much he hates those words Shel." Sophie put her tray on an empty bed.

"Ask her again Morgan." Peters stare never left JJ and JJ's never left Peter.

"Ok…" Morgan looked to the team with a raised eyebrow and then at JJ and Peter "How's it going Princess." Morgan continued with caution.

There was silence till JJ gave in, sighed and moved her look to Morgan "I will be Ok, once we get home."

"Thankyou." Peter smiled at her.

"Ok were going to get ready." Sophie grabbed Peters arm "The flowers are here, the food is all set and Jess will be driven up to Hope Falls in a few hours and we will meet her there." JJ looked down at her lap as Peter and Sophie walked out.

"What's Hope Falls?" Rossi asked JJ.

"Its where were burying Jess. Frank, the man who started Mt Horizon, He had a son who died of an overdose when he was a teenager. I guess Frank realized that there were so many screwed up kids out there and not enough people willing enough to help them so he started this place. Anyway Frank buried his son there. It's a beautiful place and Jess loved it there, so I thought what better place to let her rest in peace that the place she felt most safe."

"That's really sweet." Garcia rested her head on JJ shoulder.

The next few hours were filled with people walking in and out of the bathroom and shower room getting ready for the funeral ahead. Hotch, Morgan, Rossi and Reid were all in their smartest black suits with matching black ties along with Emily who wore a light blue shirt under her suit jacked and secretly hidden under all their trousers were their weapons. Garcia was wearing a black dress with a small hat just to the side of her head.

JJ was the last to finish getting ready and she finally walked out of the bathroom. She had on one of her work suits with a light pink button up shirt underneath, JJ also had the gun strapped to her ankle, but what was most worrying to the group of Profilers was JJ's face, she looked like she was about to go and address the media. She didn't look scared, hurt or broken like she did just a few hours before. She looked like their old JJ, which is what they all wanted but not like this. JJ had to deal with all her emotions and guilt before she could be her old self.

"You don't have to be strong round us, you know that JJ." Hotch walked up to her and put a hand on she shoulder.

"I know" she smiled at him "But I have to do this for Jess."

"Ok, lets go and wait outside till its time to go" Hotch rested his hand on the base of JJ's back for support.

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><p><strong>AN the next chapter has a guest arriving at the funeral. **

**Please review beautiful people im struggling with the ending still and a boost will come in handy **

**AJ x**


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N Sorry for the late update guys ive been sick.**

**AJ x**

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><p>The team all walked together to meet Peter and Sophie at the administration lodge at the front of the grounds.<p>

As they rounded the corner they were met by the group of Cliffhangers along with Grace and her mother Annie.

"Shel" Annie walked up to JJ and hugged her "It's so good to see you."

"You too." JJ returned the hug as Peter and Sophie walked up to the group of people.

"How are we getting up there Peter?" Juliette asked with Auggie's arms wrapped round her bump.

"Cars up to the closest point then it will only be a 10 minute walk till we reach the falls" Peter looked at Hotch "Do you mind taking your SUV?"

"No, that's fine." Hotch nodded.

A car was pulling into a free spot but as it was still a school none of them really noticed it.

"Guys listen." JJ's quite voice was just about heard by everyone "I owe you all apologies." She quickly looked at her team to her left "And before you say that I don't, I do." She turned back and looked at everyone. As JJ was speaking know one noticed the couple walking up to them "I let you all down in someway and there aren't enough words to express how sorry I am and…"

Some one cleared their throat behind JJ.

"Hey Kitten" JJ didn't need to turn round or even open her eyes to know who it was standing behind her but she hoped to whatever god that would hear her that she was wrong. The colour in her face vanished quicker than a bullet would leave a gun and she slowly turned round to see the monster from her dreams standing in front of her holding her mothers hand.

"Wa…w…walt" JJ whispered as all of the BAU team took either a protective step in front of JJ or closer to her.

"I suggest you both leave now." Hotch growled.

"Excuse me." Scott moved next to the BAU team "Can we help you?" Peter would have stopped him but he was in too much shock to move.

"Yes, I'm here for my daughter's funeral." Alice spoke, her voice was shaky and it was obvious she had been crying.

"Your Shelby's mother?" Scott asked as he realized who they man holding her hand would be "and that would make you…"

"A son of a bitch." Morgan went to lunge for the older man but JJ came out of her shock and grabbed him before he could do anything.

"Derek no…" He turned to look at her a little shocked and so did most of the others "not today. Today is about Jess, nothing else."

"Are you sure you don't want to make this about you Shelby" Alice spat her daughters name "You always were an attention seeking little cow." JJ span on her heals and looked at her mother "You never did know when to keep your mouth closed did you."

"You can not still be blaming me for this?" Anger filled JJ's eyes.

"Yes I am because it's your fault! You shouldn't have ran away and left her to deal with everything."

"Wh..What! I should have stayed?" JJ moved round the team to stand toe to toe with her mother "He came into my bedroom every night and raped me! He did things to me that would sicken any mother but not you." For the first time she willingly let Shelby out of her cage "You knew what he was doing to me but you didn't care, as long as he didn't touch your little baby he could do what ever he wanted to me." Tears started to fill her eyes "That Monster left your bed each night. Do you want to know what he did to me MUM! He touched me, he took my innocents, he forced himself in me, he made me bleed, made me want to kill my self because I was dirty but I put up with it for 5 years because he promised that if I didn't tell he wouldn't touch Jess but I couldn't take it any more so instead of going to the police I ran away from him. I thought that if I just left and still kept my mouth shut she would be ok." Her mother no longer look angry but she didnt seem upset, she had the same old cold look JJ grew up with "I remember the first night he did it. He came in on my 10th birthday and climbed on top of me I begged him not to and I called for you. I called for you but you never came. You left me with him because you were too scared of being alone with two children so you sacrificed me for your own happiness."

"Kitten, show your mother some respect!" Walt took a step towards JJ but The BAU team and everyone else took one towards him.

"Take a step closer to her and I will put a bullet threw your head." Morgan growled then bent down to pull his gun out of the holster, to his and everyone else's surprise Hotch didn't stop him.

"What? Show her the same respect you showed me? Do you know what you are? You're a dirty old man who likes to rape little girls. You like to hear them beg you to stop. I wish I had killed you the night I called the police. I came so close to killing the both of us but I didn't because I wanted justice for Jess. I was already damaged beyond repair but not Jess there was still something in her to save but when you got released, there wasn't really anything left to save in her." JJ wiped the tears that had fallen down her face.

"I think its now time you left." Rossi growled again.

"No…" JJ looked her mother and Walt in the eye.

"WHAT? Jayje you can't be serious?" Morgan asked with his gun still in his hand.

"I'm deadly serious. I want them to see what they did to Jess because they are also the reason she's dead not just me and I also want them both to see that I refuse to be broken anymore. I have the family that I have always wanted and even with what he did to me I still made something of myself." JJ didn't loose eye contact with either of the people from her nightmares.

"JJ are you sure that's what you want?" Hotch asked, he turned and looked her in the eye. He needed to make sure there wasn't even the smallest little amount of doubt in them.

"I'm sure Hotch."

"Ok" He turned to them "You get in your car and you will follow us. Under no circumstances will you approach Agent Jareau. Do I make myself clear?"

Walt just stared at JJ and Alice gave them all dirty looks and they both walked to their car and waited for them to go.

Emily was standing next to JJ when she saw the blonde's knees shake and start to give in. Emily quickly wrapped her arm round JJ waist to stop her falling to the floor. JJ was visibility shaking and you could see just by looking at her they she wasn't coping very well.

"Its ok Jayje, you can cry." The BAU team gathered round her as the others held back to give the blonde some space.

"No I can't, not while their here."

JJ pulled her self together with the help of her family.

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><p><strong>AN YAY JJ finaly got to vent at her mother.**

**i didnt write what happened at the funeral. i did try but i didnt go together too well s the next chapter is after the funeral.**

**AJ x**


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N OHH its getting good again.**

**AJ x**

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><p>90 minutes later the Black SUV as well as many other cars pulled into the car park at the school and everyone gathered in the lodge.<p>

JJ walked in behind the Cliffhangers and was pulled back by the BAU team, as well as Peter and Sophie.

"You did really well baby girl." Morgan pulled a tear stained JJ to his chest.

"Were all proud of you Shel." Sophie rubbed her back.

"Thanks" She said against his shirt and pulled back to say something else but froze.

"You ok angelfish?" Garcia put her arm round JJ's shoulders.

When JJ didn't reply they all followed her line of sight to see Alice and Walt standing in the door way.

"I..im going to get some painkillers my head is killing me."

"Ok do you want me to come with you?" Emily asked with her hand on JJ's back.

"No…I'm ok I'll be back in a minute." And she walked off out of a different door, away from her mother and step-father.

"Did you see the way he was looking at Jayje threw the service?" Garcia asked with anger in her eyes.

"He was undressing her with his eyes and that smirk he was giving her…" Sophie clenched her fists.

"She knew he was watching her too. She was shaking like a leaf." Emily added.

"Its time for them to leave!" Rossi growled.

"Agreed." Morgan and all the others walked over to them.

"That was a lovely service ." Walt held out his hand to shake Peters but Peter refused. Anger was boiling inside his as Walt acted like there was nothing wrong.

"You're leaving now" Hotch looked Alice in the eye.

"I want to say goodbye to our daughter first. Where is she?" The team didn't miss the use of the word 'our' in her sentence.

"She has gone to do something and when she gets back you and your scum bag husband are going to be long gone. Do we make ourselves clear?" Emily moved in front of the couple and caught Walt's stare. He was looking at Emily like she was something he had stepped in.

"If you ever go near her again or even step foot in the same state as her, we will find out and I promise you, you will wish you had never laid your dirty hands on that girl. Now Go!" Rossi hissed.

They were all giving the couple looks that would break the strongest of Unsubs and Alice gave in.

"Fine. C'mon Walt were going." Alice turned to the door.

"I need to use the toilet first. I'll meet you at the car." He winked at Alice and handed her the car keys. He watch and waited till she was out of the door and turned back to the people in front of him. He gave them a smile that sent shivers up their spines and walked to the bathroom.

Walt walked out a few minutes later still wearing that look and headed for the door but instead of walking out he turned to everyone in the room.

"Did you know she likes it rough and hard? She loved it! She begged me for more!"

Morgan, Scott, Emily and Rossi lunged for Walt. Scott, Emily and Rossi were grabbed before they got too far but Morgan managed to slip out of Peters grasp and punched Walt smack in the jaw causing the older man to land on the floor with a split lip.

Peter and Hotch grabbed Morgan before he could do anymore damage.

"Get out before we let him and the others go." Hotch growled as Walt got off the floor.

"Give Kitten a kiss for me." Walt smirked and left the Lodge.

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><p>JJ walked into the old Cliffhanger dorm room and planted herself on her bed. She put her head in her hands and a few more tears fall. She couldn't believe that her mother had brought her monster, the man that had hurt her and Jess so badly. Now it was all over, Jess had been buried they team knew her biggest secrets and she was ready to go home and try and get back to normal, if that was possible.<p>

JJ got up took her jacked off and lent down to remove her ankle holster because it was rubbing. She threw the gun on the bed grabbed the small box of pain killers and headed for the bathroom.

JJ came out a few minutes later and threw the box onto the bed where her gun should have been but she didn't notice it was gone. JJ was about to grab for her jacked when she felt something cold hand press against her back and another hand cover her mouth.

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><p>"You've been a naughty girl Kitten." Walt whispered in her JJ's ear.<p>

He moved her gun to her side, the hand over her mouth slid down her neck and he squeezed blocking of any air she needed "You're going to be quite for me and were going to go for a walk." The hand round her neck gave one final tight squeeze then slipped down to her chest and it rested on her right breast for a second then it continued down and wrapped round her stomach.

Walt pushed his face into her hair and took a big sniff "mmmm Kitten you smell so good."

"wh…What are you going to do?" JJ sounded so small just like she did when she was 10.

"Were going to go out the door and your not going to bring any attention to your self then were going to take a little walk into the woods." JJ's knees started to shake she had no way of telling the others what was going on.

"Walt please…" JJ whispered as tears formed in her eyes, she knew what was coming.

"Be quite and move" He kissed the base of her neck and hid the gun under his jacked but still had it pointed at JJ. They walked out of the door and across the grass. JJ looked round to see if she could spot anyone and send some kind of signal for help but the only person she saw was young Amy. JJ locked eyes with the girl but Amy didn't seem to understand what was wrong so she went back to reading the book on her lap.

The first tear slid down JJ's cheek as they entered the woods.

They had been walking for about 10 minutes in the thick trees when they came to a small opening. Walt took the gun from his jacket and pushed it against JJ's ribs causing her to gasp in pain at the force.

He kissed the bottom of JJ's neck and across her shoulder "No one can hear you now Kitten" He whispered. She could feel his hot breath against her skin. As he sank his teeth into her shoulder his free hand trailed down to the button on her jeans and he undid it.

"Please Walt…Don't do this. You've taken enough from me already. Don't do this again." More tears cascaded down JJ's cheek and landed on her shirt.

She could feel his hand push its way past her underwear and touch her center "Oh Kitten but I want to do this." JJ started to struggle as he stroked her core but she stopped then she felt her gun push harder into her ribs "Now be good and come for me Kitten then we can have our little chat."

"No…" She started to protest but yelled out in pain as Walt forced two fingers into JJ's most private place. He forced them in and out till JJ's legs started to shake.

It was then that some of the shock wore off and the frightened blonde elbowed Walt in the stomach causing him to remove his fingers from her trousers and take a few steps back. JJ took a few steps forward ready to run when Walt grabbed her, span her round and smacked her over the temple with the base of her own gun. JJ landed on the floor, her vision was blurry and her head was spinning. She could just about see Walt standing over he, he kicked JJ in the stomach, back and ribs causing a few to break.

"Stop, Arrrr, please" JJ begged trying to curl into the fetal position. With one last forceful kick to JJ's back Walt stopped.

He dropped the gun to the floor and climbed on top of JJ. He stretched her body out and pulled her arms above her head, holding them up with one of his large hands.

"That wasn't very nice Kitten. I was just trying to show you how much I love you." Walt punched her round the face causing a cut to from where his wedding ring hit her cheek bone "The way you spoke to your mother and me earlier in front of your friends was very disrespectful Kitten. I don't like the way you have changed since you've been gone. When you were at home, you knew your place and knew what would happen if you stepped out of line" He lowered his head to JJ's neck again and started kissing her "I was going to be nice and genital just like when you were little but now you need to be punished." He bit down hard on JJ's collar bone causing her to yell out again.

She started struggling again but with her blurry vision, spinning head and the fact she was exhausted from the past week JJ wasn't strong enough to fight him off and she quickly realized it. So she stopped fighting and lay there as still as she could waiting for him to finish.

When he realized she was no longer going to fight he let go of her arms and ripped her shirt open causing buttons to fly in every direction. She was wearing a light pink bra and she ribs were slightly showing threw her skin. Walt grabbed both of her breasts in his hands and whispered in JJ's ear "You've lost a little weight Kitten. You look good."

JJ turned her head away from him. She stared off in the distance as he kissed his way down her neck and over each breast. It was when Walt got to her bellybutton that JJ saw her gun just a few millimeters out of her reach.

She slowly reached her hand so he wouldn't notice what she was doing but she still couldn't reach. She still needed to get closer. Walt had made his was past her bellybutton now and was slowly undoing her zipper on her jeans. That gave her the opportunity to tip her upper body over and tap the edge of the gun. She stretched just a little more and she finally had it in her hand.

She held it up to him and pulled the trigger. A shot echoed threw the silence of the forest.

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><p><strong>AN What happens next? **

**I should have 1 more up before christmas.**

**My Reviews have died down guys please talk to me, im starting to think im getting boring :o(**

**AJ x**


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE **

**AJ x**

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><p>Emily looked down at her watch then up at the closed door.<p>

"She's been gone almost 20 minutes. I'm gonna go and find her." Emily stood from her seat.

"I'll come with you; I could do with the fresh air." Garcia also stood looping her arm in Emily's.

"I'm sure she's fine." Reid said eating a bit of sandwich.

"I expect she's just fallen asleep. It had been a long day." Rossi said from his spot next to Ezra.

"Most likely but were going to check on her anyway." Emily and Garcia turned towards the door just as it opened.

"What are you still doing here; I thought we told you to leave!" Garcia spat and everyone in the room looked and saw Alice standing in the door way.

"I came to find my husband." Alice said frustrated and slightly pissed of.

"Excuse me?" The BAU team all stood up at their guts indicated something was wrong but the Old Cliffhangers and Peter and Sophie didn't put two and two together.

"Walt hasn't come back from the toilet! Do you really think I want to spend anymore time with that thing I called a daughter for longer than I have to?"

"He left here about 15 minutes ago." Peter said as he and Sophie stood finally putting it together. The whole BAU team and the councilors ran past Alice and out the door. The Cliffhangers looked at them confused and quickly followed them.

They all ran into the cabin but there was no sign of JJ. Her jacket was still on the bed and her holster was on the floor minus the gun.

"No" Garcia whispered and put her hand over her mouth.

"He's got her!" Emily ran out of the cabin and into the middle of the lawn.

"Where would they be?" Hotch asked Peter and Sophie as the all joined to gather on the grass.

"What's going on?" Scott ran up to them closely followed by the other Cliffhangers.

"We think Walt has Shelby!" Sophie was panicking.

"WHAT!" Daisy yelled. She might be pissed off with JJ still but she didn't deserve to be in the hands of him again.

"Peter! Where would they be?" Hotch yelled eager for an answer.

"I don't know" Peter ran a hand threw his hair.

Amy walked up the group of distraught looking people.

"What's going on?"

"Amy. Have you seen Agent Jareau?" Peter asked taking a step towards the teenager.

"They blonde one?"

"Yes! Have you seen her?" Emily asked.

"Yeah. I saw her walking towards the tree line with an old looking man he looked like her dad or something." She shrugged her shoulders and walked off.

"SHIT!" Morgan cursed and reached down to pull his trouser leg up and pull out his gun. Hotch, Emily, Rossi and Reid followed his lead.

"Let's go. We don't know how long he's had her or what he's done." Hotch turned to run off with the team.

"Were coming with you." Peter followed.

"No that's out of the question." Hotch refused.

"We know these woods better than anyone. We are all coming with you!" Scott almost yelled

"We don't have time for this. Fine but you" He pointed to Juliette with her pregnant belly "Garcia stay with her and see if you can track JJ's phone she had it in her trouser pocket."

"I'm on it. Find her my super agents please." Garcia started to cry.

"Don't worry baby girl, we will" Morgan kissed Garcia on the forehead and followed the others into the woods with their guns drawn.

"We all stick together! Under no circumstances do we split up." Hotch announced "This man is dangerous."

Hotch, Morgan, Emily, Rossi, Reid, Peter, Sophie, Daisy, Ezra, Kat and Auggie ran deeper and deeper into the trees calling for JJ.

"JJ, can you hear us!" Morgan yelled.

"SHELBY!" Scott yelled.

"Everyone stop, just listen for a minute." Peter told everyone.

For the first few seconds all they could hear was birds and the wind in the trees then they heard a noise they didn't recognize.

"This way!" Peter pointed west and everyone ran in the direction.

They ran for another minute when a shot rang out just a few 100 meters ahead of them.

"JJ!" Emily yelled and they all ran of towards the sound

They came to the small clearing a few seconds later to see JJ laying face up on the cold muddy floor. Her shirt and trousers were undone, her face, wrists, chest and stomach were covered in bruises and her whole top left side was covered in blood.

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><p>JJ didn't realize there was anyone there till she heard twigs snapping to her left. She quickly got a tight grip of the gun again and pointed it towards the sound.<p>

"JJ stop. It's us!" Emily walked out of the trees.

"It's ok JJ." Morgan stepped out "Its Emily and Morgan baby girl. Were all here."

When JJ saw them all walk out of the tree line, she dropped the gun back to the floor and stared up at the sky again.

Emily and Morgan looked at each other worried, put their guns away and ran towards JJ on the floor.

Morgan picked her gun up and tucked it in his trousers as he and Emily knelt down on the grass next to her.

"Baby girl, are you ok." When he didn't get a response he quickly checked her over. On closer inspection she had bite marks and love bites to her neck and shoulders she also had a few on top of both her breasts. She had two deep cuts on her face and dark blue and black bruising to 50% of her body. Emily saw the others slowly walking over and shook her head towards Hotch.

"All of you stay here." Hotch looked at the Cliffhangers and Peter and Sophie. They all looked scared.

Rossi, Reid and Hotch joined Emily and Morgan by JJ.

"Is she ok?" Reid asked looking over JJ's body.

"I don't know she's not responding to us." Morgan took his jacket off and placed it over JJ's chest as she shivered.

Hotch knelt down next to her head and stroked her hair trying to get some sort of response other that her looking up at the sky.

"JJ look at me" Hotch said in his best stern voice. It took a few seconds but JJ responded.

"I…i…I'm s..sorry" Her voice was shaky and she looked like she was going into shock.

"Shhhh, you have nothing to be sorry for." Emily took JJ's hand and started rubbing comforting circles on the back of it.

"What happened JJ?" Rossi asked.

"He tr..t…tried to r…rape m…me." Her whole body was shaking and a small trickle of blood came from her nose again.

"We need to get her back to the school." Emily whispered to the men in the small group.

"I know." Hotch ran a hand threw his hair.

"Where did he go JJ?" Rossi asked stroking her hair.

"I s…shot him in t…the shoulder. He r…ra…ran off."

"Good girl." Rossi made eye contact with Hotch and nodded "Reid come with me." Both Rossi and Reid ran up to the others.

"Is she ok?" Sophie asked.

"He's done some nasty damage but I think she'll be fine. Walt ran off we need your help to find him." Rossi asked Peter.

"Sure. Ezra, Auggie, Kat and I will come with you. Sophie, Scott and Daisy, Help them get Shelby back to the school." When he received nods from everyone the 5 men ran of in the direction Walt went.

"JJ can you get up?" Hotch asked. She nodded in response.

Emily gently grabbed hold of one arm and Morgan grabbed the other to help JJ stand. As she got up she winced in pain and Morgan's jacket fell off.

"Here" Emily pulled off hers "Take mine." She helped JJ put it on and do up the buttons.

JJ took a few steps towards the last remaining Cliffhangers and almost collapsed. If it wasn't for Morgan standing behind her she would have fallen to the ground.

"Jayje, we really need to get you back and your injuries checked out, can you please let Morgan carry you?" Emily held her hand as JJ lent against Morgan.

"No I can walk." JJ pushed off Morgan and this time she only took one step before collapsing in pain.

"Please JJ stop being stubborn." Hotch gave her a stern look and she nodded "Thankyou" Hotch stepped back and let Morgan lift the broken woman into his arms.

JJ wrapped her arms round his neck and silently cried into his shirt.

Sophie, Scott and Daisy walked just ahead with the others following. Every now and again Hotch and Emily could hear JJ let out a quite sob and Morgan could feel her tears making his shirt damp.

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><p><strong>AN Its going to start ending now but there is still a few chapters left.**

**Have a good christmas guys **

**AJ x**


	19. Chapter 19

**A/N Hope Everyone have a fab christmas.**

**AJ x**

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><p>They all finally made it back to the cabin where Garcia and Juliette were waiting.<p>

They all walked in and Morgan gently placed JJ on her bed.

"ARRRR!" She yelled when her bruised back hit the mattress.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry." Morgan took a step back and let Emily take over.

"Oh my buttercup what has he done to you?" Garcia knelt on the other side of the bed.

".GOD…" Juliette put a hand over her mouth.

"We found her like that on the floor in the woods." Scott informed her.

"Is she going to be ok?" Juliette asked.

"I don't know." Sophie answered before walking over the BAU team "Is there anything you need?"

"We could do with a few first aid kits." Emily answered unbuttoning the jacked JJ was wearing.

"Ok. I'll get the nurse as well." Emily just nodded and Sophie left the room with Scott.

Emily was on the last button when JJ's hand grabbed hers and stopped her.

Hotch could see panick I JJ's eyes when she looked between him and Morgan. "Morgan and I will go and wait for the others over there ok?" Hotch looked at JJ and she nodded.

Emily mouthed Thankyou as the walked away.

"Pen, can you get me another shirt from her bag?"

"Sure." Garcia sniffed and rummaged threw the bag by JJ's bed side.

"I'm going to sit you up so we can take your top of ok?" Emily asked taking the clean top from Garcia.

"No…just cut it off. It's not like I can wear it again anyway."

The door swung open and Sophie and Scott ran in with the nurse and first aid kits.

"Wait…" Morgan grabbed Scott as they went to run past "Let Sophie and the nurse go over." Scott's eyebrows joint together in confusion "Shes a bit weary of men at the minute. Even myself and Hotch."

"Oh…right, ok." Scott could understand why the opposite sex was scaring her and he handed the kits to Sophie.

10 minutes later they were all standing outside the door when it opened and Sophie and Garcia walked out. Garcia ran into Morgan's arms and cried.

"What happened, is she ok?" Daisy asked panicking. She hated seeing JJ hurt, she still loved her even though she wouldn't admit it to anyone.

"Yeah we thought we should give them some space to do what they have to do." Sophie lent against the cabin wall.

At that moment Rossi, Reid, Peter, Ezra, Kat and Auggie walked round the corner empty handed.

"We managed to follow his trail for a few 100 meters but then we lost it." Peter answered before anyone could say anything.

"How is she?" Rossi asked concerned.

"Emily and the nurse are in with her now." Sophie answered.

"Has the nurse said anything?" Hotch asked Sophie.

"Erm… yeah, possibly a few fractured rib and a small concussion. She wanted Shel to go to hospital but she said no."

"She hates hospitals." Reid said as the other BAU members sniggered they had been together long enough to know what each other did and didn't like and Hospitals was at the top of everyone's 'didn't like' lists "What about the bruising. It was really dark; did she say anything about internal bleeding?" Reid asked.

"She said she didn't think so…"

The door opened and Emily walked out.

"What happened?" Garcia asked.

"Calm down PG" Emily ran a hand threw her dark hair "She's ok. She just stepping into the shower than the nurse is going to bandage her up."

"Did she say anything about what he did?" Hotch asked. He didn't want to know but he needed to.

"No but its possible he raped her again, but we wont know till we ask." Emily sighed as she pulled Garcia into a hug. Peter did the same with Sophie and Auggie did the same with Juliette.

"What makes you say it's possible?" Rossi asked.

"Her jeans were undone and so was her top and she has some nasty bit marks and bruising going all the way down past the band of her trousers, but like I said its something were going to have to ask her."

The nurse came out the door with her bag in hand.

"You can all go in now but she needs to rest, she refuses to go to hospital and I can't make her. Please don't ask to many questions."

"Thankyou." Hotch and Rossi shook her hand.

"Emily was the first to walk in closely followed by Garcia. They walked over to JJ who was sat up in her bed and they sat down either side of her pulling her into a hug.

Everyone gathered round her but the BAU member's sat the closest, either on the bed or on the chairs next to the bed.

"How you feeling JJ?" Hotch asked sitting on the end of the bed.

"Sore and tired." JJ gave him a small smile.

"We need to ask you some questions." Hotch tried to read JJ's expressions and he saw her Jaw twitch with nerves.

"Ok" she sighed.

"I can ask everyone else to go if you want?" Hotch asked on the side of caution.

"No its ok they can stay, you're just going to tell them anyway."

"Ok." Hotch took a deep breath "JJ…did he rape you?" he could see JJ wince.

"No" JJ looked at Hotch and saw his forehead wrinkle "Really he didn't, he tried but I shot him before he got too far."

"Jayje…you have marks, bruising and a few scratched going under your trouser line." Emily held her hand for support as she spoke.

"He erm" JJ took a deep breath and forced the bile down that she could feel rising "He forced his fingers in me." She just about whispered. Garcia pushed a strand of hair behind JJ's ear that had fallen down.

"Ok." Hotch glanced at Rossi who nodded at him.

"Hotch." JJ sounded so hurt and scared "I just want to go home." A tear slid down her face.

He put a hand on her leg and rubbed it a little "We will, first thing in the Morning if that's what you want. We will go home and everything can go back to normal ok?" He knew it wasn't a good idea for her to just push it all away again but at this point if JJ wanted her normal life back the team would do everything they could to get it for her.

"Promise? You're not going to force me to leave?" JJ looked him in the eye.

"JJ I would never do that, ever ok? And I don't think this lot would let me even if I wanted too."

"Damn straight." Morgan said from the other side of the bed. It caused a smile to form on JJ's lips.

"I know you want to sleep JJ but I need to ask you what happened." Hotch asked as Rossi pulled out his note book to write everything down so she didn't have to go over it again.

"Ok." JJ didn't want to do this but it had to be done "I erm…I came in here and threw my jacked and gun on the bed. I then grabbed the painkillers and went into the bathroom. Erm I think I came out a few minutes later…."

JJ spent the next 15 minutes re-living it again and being comforted by Emily and Garcia as she cried.

"JJ you did really well." Morgan gave her a warm smile.

"You did." Hotch looked at her with reassurance "Were going to make some phone calls and get a warrant out for his arrest and get a few other things sorted. Garcia can you…"

"Say no more boss man. One rap sheet of the scum bag that hurt our girl coming up" Garcia grabbed her laptop and started furiously tapping away.

"JJ I want you to try and get some sleep ok?" Hotch asked "And were not going to leave you on your own."

"Ok" JJ sighed.

"Got it!" Garcia peered over the top of her laptop.

"Ok we will read it in the Lodge." Hotch turned to JJ "Rest, and that's an order"

"I will. Em will you stay with me while I sleep?" JJ asked as everyone went to leave the room a short time later. She knew she should be stronger than this, that she shouldn't ask someone to stay with her but JJ was too scared and exhausted to really care

"Of course I can." Emily sat on the bed as JJ let her head tip onto her shoulder.

By the time the men came back into the cabin with food for everyone both women seemed to be fast asleep.

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><p><strong>AN I hope its meeting everyones standards, once i have finshed the last chapter i will put it up.**

**AJ x**


	20. Chapter 20

**A/N Its the last chapter**

**AJ x**

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><p>After hours spent trying to track down Walter Blaine and not getting very far, the team decided it was time to sleep.<p>

They all except for Emily and JJ managed to get into their beds at around 3AM only to be woken some hours later by another one of JJ's nightmares.

"Its ok JJ, it's just a dream, wake up for me." Emily stroked JJ's damp hair off her sweaty face.

"Is she ok?" Garcia asked joining Emily by the bed.

"No. this is the second one she's had tonight. She had the first a few hours after you all went to the lodge." Emily looked over her shoulder to see everyone up and Hotch and Morgan walking over to them.

"Emily Help!" JJ yelled.

"C'mon JJ wake up, were here." Garcia grabbed JJ's hand and rubbed it as the first few droplets of blood dripped out of JJ's nose and down her cheek.

"Damit. C'mon" Emily was starting to tear up with worry "Listen to my voice Jayje. Follow my voice." JJ stopped thrashing round and was just moaning "That's it, good girl." She stopped moaning and her eyes started to flicker open.

"Hey Cupcake." Garcia smiled from ear to ear but her eyes stayed filled with worry.

JJ looked round and saw 6 sets of eyes gazing at her "I'm sorry I woke you all." She sat up and quickly regretted it when an immense amount of pain shot threw her ribs.

"Don't be, its ok." Hotch rubbed he leg.

"How are you holding up?" Morgan handed her a tissue. JJ grabbed it and gently wiped away the blood she could feel on her face.

"I just want to go home." Tears filled her eyes.

"We will as soon as the sun rises but JJ I want you to go and see a doctor when we get back." Emily said and the others all nodded in agreement.

"No, I don't need to. It's just some bruised ribs." JJ shook her head.

"That's not what the nurse said and it's not what I'm talking about." Emily gave her a stern look, one that would give Hotch a run for his money "I mean the nose bleeds JJ. It's all the stress it can't be good for your body."

"Its ok when we get home they'll stop."

"JJ" Hotch used his boss voice.

"No Hotch before you say anything else. Look at our job, it's one of the most stressful things in the world and before we came here when was the last time you saw me with a nose bleed?"

"She's got a point." Raid interjected from the other side of the room.

"Honestly as soon as we get home and I put all this behind me it'll stop."

"Fine, but if I see any sight of it again or that you can't handle the stress of the job I will personally throw you over my shoulder and take you to the hospital myself. Clear?" JJ would have tried arguing with Hotch but she knew she wouldn't win.

"As crystal." She smiled at him "You all look exhausted. Get some sleep I'm going to take a shower."

"Jayje…" Emily said looking at the blonde.

"Please, you've got…" JJ looked at her watch "5 hours till sunrise."

"Ok" Emily kissed JJ's forehead "if you need anything just come and wake me."

"Ok, I will."

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><p>6 hours later a fully dressed and packed BAU team walked into the Lodge.<p>

"Are you all packed?" Sophie handed out the cups of coffee to the sleepy looking team.

"Yeah, we've got everything." JJ gave her a tired smile.

"All the old Cliffhangers and Peter walked into the Lodge.

"How you feeling?" Peter stepped up next to his wife and asked JJ.

"I'm in a bit of pain but other than that everything's ok." Peter raised an eyebrow at her "Really Peter."

"Hmmm ok." Peter pulled JJ into a hug "It's been good to see you kid." He whispered in her ear and pulled back "don't be a stranger anymore. Call us, come and visit if you get the chance."

"I'd like that." A warm smile crossed JJ's face.

"We'll take you bag to the car JJ." Hotch took her bag from her hand "Take your time." He winked.

The other members of the BAU said their goodbye's and thankyou's to the camp councilors and Cliffhangers and walked to the door.

"erm…Hang on." Peter and Sophie walked towards them "I would like a word."

"Ok." Hotch gave Rossi an odd look.

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><p>"What do you think that's about?" Juliette asked.<p>

"I'm sure I could think of a few reasons." JJ turned back to her old team members "I know it's not enough but I am really sorry I abandoned you all the way I did."

"Its ok lost girl were all just glad your ok." Ezra pulled JJ into a hug.

"Yeah" once Ezra pulled away Auggi held her tight "And were so proud of you Shel."

"You made something of your self. You have an amazing job and from what we can see an amazing family." Kat hugged JJ as tears started to fill her eyes.

JJ pulled away and looked at the three people than made a massive impact on her life.

"Jules, I'm sorry for the things I called you…" JJ stopped when Juliette almost pounced on her.

"Don't be sorry. Its ok, I understand now you were scared and you never meant any of it." Juliette whispered in JJ's ear.

"You're going to make a great mum." JJ winked at her and took a step back "Scott, I did love you know."

"Really?" A flicker of hope filled his eyes.

"Yeah, other than Peter you were the first guy I ever trusted after everything that happened, you understood some of the things I was going threw. You were my first love and you will always have a special place in my heart." Scott pulled JJ close to his chest and she rested her head listening to his heart beat.

"I will always love you Shel, nothing is ever going to change that." Scott whispered and kissed the top of her head. He took a step back and JJ turned to Daisy. They locked eyes for a few seconds not saying anything just remembering how each other used to be.

"Are you still mad at me?" JJ knew the answer but she didn't know how else to start the convocation.

"Yes…" Daisy spat but upon seeing the hurt look in JJ's eyes she went "I am still mad at you…"

"Daisy!" Scott voice was heard from behind Daisy.

"Let me finish! I am still mad at you BUT I understand now why you did it and its ok. Just because you ran I never stopped seeing you as my best friend Shel. I was just hurt that you didn't think you could talk to me." She gave the beaten up blonde a sad smile.

"I didn't want to burden you with my problems; you were still dealing with the effects of your mother and father." A tear left JJ's eye.

"Oh Shelby…" Daisy held JJ tight "You were never a burden. I was always ready to listen and I always will be." Daisy pulled out a sheet of paper and handed it to JJ "It's all out numbers and E-Mail addresses and if you don't keep in contact none of your friends over there will be able to stop me getting at you." Daisy gave her a big grin.

"I will, I promise." She folded the paper back up and put in the pocket of her jeans.

"We'll hold you to that." Daisy gave her one last hug.

"Right we had better get going." JJ and the old Cliffhangers all walked over to the SUV where the others were waiting for JJ.

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><p>"erm…Hang on." Peter and Sophie walked towards them "I would like a word."<p>

"Ok." Hotch gave Rossi an odd look.

When they all reached the SUV Morgan and Hotch put the bags in and they all turned to look at Peter and Sophie.

"I just want to ask you to watch her." Peter had a concerned look on his face.

"Of course we would, you don't have to ask." Morgan was slightly offended that they were asked that.

"Why would you think we wouldn't?" Rossi asked in his defensive manor.

"Oh god, he wasn't trying to say wouldn't" Sophie said "Its just we know how this can and most likely will effect Shelby. She can do some silly things when she's hurting."

"We just wanted to make sure she was in safe hands, that's all." Peter gave them all an apologetic look.

"Their aren't any safer hands than ours." Garcia gave the older couple a warm smile.

"Good."

"The thing is she wont talk and I think you all realize that now." The BAU team nodded at Sophie's statement "So your going to have to make her talk."

"Writher it be by making her angry or locking her in a room with you until she dose."

"We understand." Hotch said.

"Their coming guys." Emily looked over her shoulder.

"Are we all set?" JJ asked her team.

"Yeah we were just waiting for you to finish." Garcia pulled JJ in to a much needed hug.

"We'll go and get in the car, Take your time JJ." Hotch gave her a kind smile and the BAU team climbed into their seats.

"Thankyou." JJ whispered looking down at the ground.

"What for Shel, we didn't do anything." Peter wrapped an arm round the blondes shoulders.

"For making everything easier than it should have been."

"Don't be daft, were all just glad to have you back." Sophie said with a resounding yes from the others.

"Well." JJ took a deep breath "I guess I had best be going."

"Come here." Peter and Sophie pulled her into a hug "Were so proud of you Shelby, we love you." Sophie whispered in JJ's ear.

JJ pulled back and wiped away the tear that had fallen "I'll call you."

"Make sure you do." Peter watch JJ climb into the can and smile at them.

"She's going to be ok isn't she Peter?" Scott asked from behind as the car drove away.

"I think so."

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><p><strong>AN I wasnt to keen on the last few bits but i wasnt sure how elase to write them.**

**there WILL be a sequel. Just give me a bit of time as things at home have just beed turned upside down but bare with me guys and i will have it up.**

**I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as i did writing it and i want to say a BIG thankyou to everyone that added it to thair Fave, Alerts and/or wrote a review. I love you all.**

** AJ x**


	21. Chapter 21

hey Guys and girl's

i just wanted to let you know i have started to publish the sequel.

Its called 'forced back to hell' and you can find it on my profile page.

i would love you all to read it and let me know what you think

love AJ xx


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